Reference: posted by: vejeestu on 6/20/00 to Kirpal Singh Satsang Club; Messages number 377-79
It is life's greatest blessing to be at the feet of a Sant Satguru. I was privileged to serve Hazur Baba Sawan Singh Ji Maharaj for about forty years. I first came to Him when I was very young, and I was blessed to serve Him to the last. I not only looked after the housekeeping for the Great Master and attended personally to getting and cooking His food and serving it to Him, but also to His clothes, their tailoring, washing, ironing, and mending, and to other household needs of the Great Master.
I got to know Sant Kirpal Singh Ji, who we then addressed as Bhapa Ji (respected brother), fairly early—that is about the time He came to the feet of Hazur. He was a disciple of very exceptional devotion to our Satguru. Even if He got just a day's leave, He would travel from Lahore to Beas.
Once at the Dera, He would be so lost, so taken up with His Master, that He would lose all sense of whether His clothes were clean or not, neat or torn, or whether His hair was tidy. He would often put His shoes at one place and later be looking for them at another. I once remarked, "Bhapa Ji, if women get lost like this, it is pardonable; but You—You should not be in this condition! What is wrong with You?" He looked to me, and said, "Bibi Ji, I do not know; when I reach the railway station here, it is as though I have lost half my senses, and when I arrive at the Dera I lose the remaining half. When I look into His eyes, there is magic: I am simply lost."
Once in Beas, He would stay on as long as possible. he would be workoing often up to midnight and return to Lahore by the 1:00 a.m. train. He would reach HIs destination around 3:00 a.m., and then after getting home He would be off to the office the next morning. If when leaving, Hazur would offer to have Him dropped at the station in His car, Bhapa Ji would find some excuse. He would say, "I am not going just yet. Maybe I will be going somewhat later." He would sometimes say to me when I protested, "Why add to the wear and tear of Hazur's car?"
Such was His reverence for His Satguru that when departing from the Dera He would almost walk backwards so as I turn His back upon the Master's home. It was only after He was almost out of sight that He would turn around and walk straight towards the railway station.
In Hazur's presence, Sant Kirpal Singh Ji was a man of very few words. Whatever Hazur said, it was always "Yes Sir," for Him there no "ifs" and "buts." If He took a fancy to anything, His first thought was to get it for His Master. Hazur was fond of books, and when Sant Kirpal Singh Ji came across any book which He liked and thought it might please Hazur would get a copy and have it very beautifully bound and present it to Him.
Sometimes when Sant Kirpal Singh Ji came to see Hazur I would laugh and tell Him, "Bhapa Ji, if I let You go up, You would be there for such a length of time. Sorry, today we won't let you go in!" He would quietly turn away and I would have to call Him back and say, "I was only joking. Please go right up. You are always welcome." He had so much humility, and He never endeavored to assert Himself as many others did.
Hazur used to rest in His room upstairs and would retire there for the night. Once on a beautiful moonlit night Bhapa Ji was with Him till well past midnight. I was there, too. When we came down, He suddenly wanted to go up again. "Bibi Ji, it was so wonderful! Did you see? His face was so radiant, more radiant than the moon itself. He was so beautiful tonight. I would like to have His darshan again. Just this once — only for a minute." I remonstrated, "We have just been with Him. And if He has stretched Himself to sleep, He would be upset. We should not disturb Him." "Just this once, only a minute. Just a glimpse." Seeing Him insist, I quietly went up to ask Hazur if He could let Bhapa Ji come up again. On hearing me out He said, "Oh, Kirpal is a sieve, just a sieve—and so are you!"
I thought He was reprimanding us, and asked, "Hazur are we so bad? Do you mean that we are unable to contain Your grace and whatever love You pour simply drains through?" "No, no, that is not what I mean," Hazur laughed. "When a disciple is truly devoted, He is like a sieve. There is no limit to the love and grace He can receive. Whatever you give, He still thirsts and yearns for more. You cannot fill Him up just as you cannot fill up a sieve." And so I went down and brought up Bhapa Ji.
Once having cleaned and washed some wheat, I had laid it out to dry. Seeing it, Bhapa Ji asked me if it was for my own use. Hazur ate very little and I explained that I would be hand-grinding flour for His chapatis for the month. I was particular about attending to such things myself, but BhapaJi asked me to let Him grind the flour, saying, "Bibi Ji why can't you allow me to have the blessings by permitting me to do seva such as this?"
There were no limits which Sant Kirpal SinghJi set to His love and service of Hazur. Every month He would bring His earnings and place them at the feet of His Satguru. Hazur would keep back whatever He pleased for seva at the Dera and give the rest for running Bhapa Ji's household. Bhapa Ji never questioned; He never mentioned if there was any special expense He had in mind back home. Whatever His Satguru gave Him from the wages He had earned, He was glad to accept for His family needs. Nothing could deter Him from fulfilling His Satguru's commands and nothing could prevent Him from coming to Beas to see Him. Once when His son was seriously ill and the doctors had almost given up hope, He took the train and came to Beas. "How is the child?" Hazur asked Him, and He replied, "You know what is best." "We can't let Him go . . ." said Hazur, and turning to me asked me to fetch some water and a bag of patasas (sugar-puffs). He dipped two of His fingers into the water and held them there for a considerable length of time. Then giving a bottle of this water and the bag of patasas to BhapaJi, He said, "Throw away all the medicines and in their place, from time to time, give the child a sugar-puff and some of this water."
There are so many memories that come back that I could go on with such anecdotes without end. But the important thing to realize is the kind of surrender that the Satguru asks of us. He wants us to renounce everything and surrender it unto Him. If we can surrender ourselves to Him, He remakes us in His own image.
Baba Jaimal Singh surrendered Himself to Swami Ji and became an image of His Satguru. Sawan Singh Ji Maharaj similarly surrendered Himself to Baba Ji and in due course became one with Him. In His turn, Maharaj Kirpal Singh Ji showed the same quality of devotion and of surrender and became indistinguishable from Hazur in the course of time. When we come to a Satguru, we must surrender everything we have to Him, body, mind and soul. If we do this, there is no reason why we cannot reach His Radiant Form within us, and having reached that Form, He takes us further and does not stop until He has made us in His own image.
The Perfect Disciple: Preamble: Bibi Lajwanti Remembers
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