Reference: posted by: vejeestu on date: 6/24/00 to Kirpal Singh Satsang Club; Message number 425
The following is an article taken from The Commemorative volume on the birth centenary of Sant Kirpal Singh Ji Maharaj. The author and her husband are good friends. In the present article she speaks of her early involvement with Eckankar and how she came to the feet of Sant Kirpal Singh.
A successful educator and author in the field of education, she has long been, along with her husband, Jay, one of the most tireless workers in the organization of Master Darshan and now Sant Rajinder Singh. She is secretary of publications, and since the mid-seventies has been responsible for overseeing the production of the books, literature, and Sat Sandesh from SKRM.
At the young age of fourteen, I began searching for answers to questions about what is the purpose of life, is there a God, and is there life after death? I began reading everything I could find on world religions and yoga. One day, while reading a book which described an "Audible Sound Current" that takes the soul back through higher planes until it reaches God, something opened up within me and tears began streaming down my cheeks. It was as if I had found a knowledge I had once known. The book was about the teachings of Hazur Baba Sawan Singh Ji Maharaj, but to my dismay the preface indicated that he had left the world in 1948. There was no picture of him and no other information. It did not refer to anyone else who was teaching this science. For the next few years I continued searching in other books for a way to be connected to the "Sound Current," and tried different forms of yoga practices. If inally found a path which taught meditation on the Sound Current. It cost a considerable amount of money to learn the science, but I paid the fees, and I diligently pursued that study for four years.
It was only after the teacher of that path passed away that I came to learn that he had been a disciple of another Master, and that he had left his Master to set himself up as a teacher and that he made money charging students for the teachings. I was confused and disillusioned, and began praying day and night, weeping profusely to God to tell me who was a true Master.
One night, in my sleep I had a vision in which I was sitting in a crowd of thousands of people in a place which looked to be in India. In the front was a large dais, with a colored tent above it. A man with a long white beard and a white turban sat on a dais, giving a talk, and then he looked at me and began speaking to me in Hindi. I did not at the time know who he was. A few nights later, I had another vision. Again, there was a gathering in India. There was a dais and a colored tent above it. Suddenly, the same figure with a white beard and white turban mounted the dais. His turban was so high that it brushed against the tent above the dais. He took a seat cross-legged and began giving a spiritual discourse in what seemed to be an Indian language. Soon afterwards another figure, much taller, with a white beard, white turban, and deep blue eyes came to the stage to sit next to him. Then a few days later, the second figure appeared to me again in a vision. He let me know that he was Kirpal Singh. He was so beautiful and full of light and magnetic power. He said he wanted to show me something. He took me into a room where people were eating meat. It looked so repulsive to me. Then he turned to me and said, "I am just showing you how disgusting it is. Don't eat meat anymore." Then he said, "I want you to write to me," and he disappeared. From that moment on I became a vegetarian. I began a search to find out who he was and how to write to him.
I went to the New York Public Library, the city's largest library which specializes in Asian religious books. To my delight, I found numerous books by Sant Kirpal Singh Ji as well as books about Hazur Baba Sawan Singh. The pictures of Hazur Baba Sawan Singh Ji and Sant Kirpal Singh Ji in the front of the books confirmed that in my vision I had seen both of them. When I skimmed through the books I saw references to the Sound Current. There were also addresses in the back of the books of places to get more information, and I began calling all the numbers. No one answered the phone when I tried the first two numbers. The third number was picked up by Sant Kirpal Singh Ji's representative in the United States, a gentleman named Mr. T.S. Khanna. I told him of my long search, and he said, "Don't worry. You have finally come to the right place." He explained that the path I had been following was taken from the teachings of Sant Kirpal Singh Ji. Mr. and Mrs. Khanna invited me to their home in Virginia to learn more about the teachings of Sant Kirpal Singh Ji. Mr. Khanna also gave me the address at which I could write to Sant Kirpal Singh Ji in India, which I did.
When I wrote to Sant Kirpal Singh Ji, I enclosed an envelope with a stamp and the return address, as I had been used to doing with my former teacher. Several weeks later I received a reply from Sant Kirpal Singh Ji himself. He told me the visions I had had of Hazur and himself were true visions, actual experiences. He told me that after reading some of the books and making sure this is what I wanted, I could apply for initiation. There was also a note from Sant Kirpal Singh Ji which said that he was returning the stamped envelope as "I have enough love here to pay the petty cost of postage." I came to learn that not only did he have "enough love" to pay postage, but his entire path was free, and he did not charge anything for the initiation, the discourses, the meditation, or anything else. That truly set this path apart from all others I had examined.
Through intensive research I saw that the path of the Sound Current I had been following all the years was that of Hazur Baba Sawan Singh Ji and Sant Kirpal Singh Ji. "But," I was told by Sant Kirpal Singh Ji's representative, "you need to receive initiation from a perfect Master in order to be connected to the Sound Current." The meditation I had been practicing all these years seemed to be the same that the students of Sant Kirpal Singh Ji were practicing, but it was only on the day I received initiation that I learned that Sant Kirpal Singh Ji was able to give an actual inner experience and contact with the inner Light and Sound. I had wanted to wait to meet Sant Kirpal Singh Ji before taking initiation, but was told that his spiritual power works through his attention across thousands of miles, and one could receive the instructions through a representaffve and derive the same results. It was the charging of the Master that actually gave the disciple the inner experience. I thought I would give it a try as there was nothing to lose, and everything to gain.
Being skeptical and analytical, I tried an experiment. I meditated early in the morning, before the initiation, and as usual there were no significant results. Then, during initiation, after being given the five Charged Names and the meditation instructions into the Light, I began soaring quickly out of my body. It was like I was on an elevator speeding to the top of a building. There were beautiful lights, and suddenly the form of Sant Kirpal Singh Ji appeared all in white, and began walking towards me. He had his arms outstretched and he was smiling at me with so much love I could never have dreamed possible. I remained absorbed in his beauty and love, and felt myself so ecstatically happy that I could not stop smiling. There was a second meditation practice in which one meditated on the inner Sound. Again, I had a beautiful experience of inner Music, which filled me with incredible peace and joy. Yes, there was something different about meditating under the guidance and connection given by a spiritually evolved Master. There was a personal firsthand experience.
About seven weeks later, Sant Kirpal Singh Ji came on his 1972 tour to the United States. Having experienced his spiritual power through initiation, I wanted to see the Master in person and see if he lived what he taught.
The first time I saw him was at Dulles Airport. We were lined up by the arrival gate, waiting with anticipation. When Sant Kirpal Singh Ji walked through the door, I thought God had entered the room. He was everything I thought God would look like if He appeared to us as a human being. As he passed by me, he looked in my eyes and I felt an electrical charging go right through me. I bowed down to touch the floor in front of him in gratitude for the gift of the Light and Sound he had granted me.
At the home of Mr. and Mrs. Khanna, I helped bring in the Master's luggage and was invited to sit in with a group who was called into his room to greet him. Sant Kirpal Singh Ji's spiritual power was so overwhelrning that I immediately began withdrawing from body-consciousness. At one point, he turned to ask me a question, but I was so withdrawn that I could not get my vocal cords to work. I kept trying to respond but could not as I had withdrawn to the third eye. This would frequently happen to me in his presence.
I was fortunate to have been staying with Mr. and Mrs. Khanna and was asked to help them serve Sant Kirpal Singh Ji during his two-week stay in Virginia. Thus, for two glorious weeks I had the chance to do service personally for the Master. I helped in the kitchen, I did his laundry, and I helped to clean his room. Also, as I was taking photography and film-making in college, I was called upon to take pictures and movies of the Master with disciples as they came to greet him from different parts of the world. I recall that on September 20, I was asked to come and take photographs of Sant Kirpal Singh Ji with his grandson, Rajinder Singh Ji whom Sant Kirpal Singh Ji called "Raji." It was Rajinder Singh Ji's birthday, and a special cake had been made for him. Sant Kirpal Singh Ji was so sweet and loving to his grandson as they sat on the bed together with the birthday cake. Sant Kirpal Singh Ji gave him a piece with his own hands. Then, he lovingly gave pieces of cake as prashad to everyone else in the room.
After this party, Sant Kirpal Singh Ji called me in and asked that I give him a set of photos of Rajinder Singh Ji's birthday party. He told me how he wanted the back of the photos labeled, and then said, "I want to send the photos to some loved ones back in Delhi." I did what he had asked, and was pleasantly surprised to find that in 1975, when I went to see Sant Darshan Singh Ji for the first time, I was shown a photo album. There in that album were the pictures I had given Sant Kirpal Singh Ji with my handwritten labels on the back of each one. The "loved ones in Delhi" he had wanted to send it to were his own beloved son, Sant Darshan Singh Ji, and his daughter-in-law, Harbhajan Kaur Ji.
During the two weeks with the Master in Virginia, I witnessed an incredible being. He worked day and night, and I never once saw him sleeping. The door to his room was always open, and as I did most of the laundry and cleaning during the night, I myself was up all night, and I could see his light was continually on. He would be either talking to people, reading, or doing correspondence or work. At times he would lie down, and one of his attendants would massage him. But he would be talking to him, or his eyes would be open. Then all day he would be giving meditation sittings and discourses, meeting people, or visiting disciples in their homes. I could not believe this schedule. He seemed to be continually in the service of the sangat, with superhuman energy.
I also discovered that he had an uncanny ability to read people's minds. Others had told me of this phenomenon, but I was to experience this for myself on a number of occasions. For example, I had been bringing the laundry to the door of his room, and Mrs. Khanna would take it from me and carry it in. After a few days I developed a wish to also enter the room with Mrs. Khanna to see Sant Kirpal Singh Ji and I wished he would know me by name. This wish became so strong that one day, when bringing the clean clothes, giving them to Mrs. Khanna, and waiting outside his door, completely out of his view, Sant Kirpal Singh Ji climbed to the edge of the bed, leaned his head out the door to see me, and motioned to me to come in. It was such a tender, loving gesture from such a magnificent being. I began to take my shoes off out of respect, and I could hear him call to me from inside, "And leave your shoes on!" So I went in, and he said, "You are the one with the camera!" and then he asked Mrs. Khanna who I was. She explained I had been staying with them and helping them in the house. He then turned to me, and said, "What is your name?" and smiled in such a way that seemed to say that he knew that was what I had been wishing for. But the way he peeked out of the room to call me in to ask my name was such an unexpected surprise. It seemed that throughout that period, whenever I wished for something sincerely, he granted it. There seemed to be a telepathic connection in which he responded to my every question, desire, and wish as if I had voiced it.
Probably the most remarkable thing I found about him was his enormous compassion and love for all people. He had a look of godly love in his eyes that was so uplifting and thrilling that one felt like dancing. I remember once, as he was coming out of the house, someone asked him to sit with the group leaders for a special meeting. There were many people gathered on the lawn who were not group leaders, but who might have been wishing, like myself, to be a part of that special meeting with him as well. Sant Kirpal Singh Ji scanned the group on the lawn, and said, "No, I will meet with all of them," and with a gesture and a smile pointed to all of us "non-group leaders." And he did invite all of us in. To him there was no high or no low. He treated all equally and with incredible love.
Meditation in Sant Kirpal Singh Ji's presence was so powerful that I had wonderful experiences of Light, Sound, and the radiant form of Sant Kirpal Singh Ji. When he asked people to raise their hands to report their inner experiences, a hall full of hundreds of people would raise their hands. They too were enjoying his spiritual radiation.
I was able to see Sant Kirpal Singh Ji on a number of tour stops, and then visited him at Sawan Ashram in Delhi in 1973 for two months. Through all these contacts I could see that he truly lived the high teachings that he taught. Seeing him in a number of circumstances, interacting with all kinds of people, revealed to me a personage who exhibited the highest human virtues. He was all love, all compassion, all nonviolence, and full of humility. While he was a great awe-inspiring being, his speech, his words, his gestures were full of humility and love. He treated us all as his children and was filled with tender, affectionate concern for our well-being, both in our spiritual as well as mundane affairs. He was full of humor and wit and there was always a soft loving laughter that danced from his lips when he spoke. The love and lightness in his eyes and his gentle bubbling laughter helped one fallow his oft-repeated instructions to "Go jolly" in life.
The last meeting physically that my husband Jay and I had with Sant Kirpal Singh Ji was in Ausust 1973, when we were preparing to leave Delhi to return to the United States. He had called us to his bedroom at his house in Sawan Ashram. He looked at me with love, and said, "Eat me and drink me." I sat there soaking in his beauty and grace. Then suddenly, an incredible sadness overtook me, and a feeling that I would never see him again. I began weeping profusely with a pain that wrenched me to my very soul. I looked over and saw that Jay was also weeping. When we stood up to go, Sant Kirpal Singh Ji also stood up. Suddenly he began walking towards us full of light and splendor. Then, unexpectedly, he took both of us in his arms and embraced us for several minutes. I never experienced so much love and upliftment in my entire life. I wished we could have remained in his arms forever. He told us, "I love you, both." Even though he was not well he insisted on walking us downstairs. He had not come downstairs to meet people for several days due to his health, but today he walked us down. As we prepared to leave his abode for the waiting taxi, he took my hands in his long, strong hands and held them. He did the same with Jay. Then with a loving glance, he bade us farewell.
We were just two insigniificant people out of the thousands and thousands of people who came to him. Yet with all his greatness and godliness, he poured out so much love and concern to us as if we were his own children. I had only been initiated for two years before he left the earth, yet the amount of love he gave me in our meetings always made me feel, as Sant Darshan Singh Ji would often say when describing Sant Kirpal Singh Ji, "as if he loved each one the most." His spiritual power and his love transcended time and space, and even after he left the physical body he showed me in numerous ways that he is always with me, guiding me, protecting me, and pouring out his love to me.
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