Reference: posted by: vejeestu on 6/28/00 to Kirpal Singh Satsang Club; Message number 456
When I met Sant Kirpal Singh Ji in 1950, I asked Him, "Where is Hazur Maharaj Baba Sawan Singh Ji? I want to see Him." He said, "Well, Hazur Maharaj Ji is here; you will find Him." I went away and two years passed by - I was in bitter pangs of separation since Hazur left the physical body, eating little, living in a sad state.
One day an old friend of mine arrived who asked me to give a Satsang; there had been a death in the family. I reluctantly went and started Satsang. Then one of our old friends went to the Ashram, and told Maharaj Ji, "We should have a lady to give Satsang from place to place in Delhi." He said, "Who do you think could do it?" She replied, "Sheila." Master said, "Well, that would be alright, but she doesn't come to me." One night, some six months after having given that Satsang, I beheld a beautiful scene; there was a lovely place where Hazur came in a motor car in a beautiful radiant Light; there was no turban on His head, but He had wooden shoes on His feet which He used to wear in the old days. Gently, lovingly, He got down from the car. With Him was Kirpal Singh Ji. I clung to Hazur, cried and said, "Where were You all this long time?" Hazur then took His seat on a stage and a Satsang was held. Kirpal Singh came and caught hold of me by the arm, and took me towards Hazur. Hazur had told me as soon as He alighted from the car, "Never mind, you will see just now." In His Satsang, Hazur took for His text a hymn: "Satguru is ever present, never think that He is far away." Then I saw that both the Saints merged into each other. Satsang was over and Sant Kirpal Singh Ji again held me by the arm, and told me, "Look, no more crying. Now you have got your Guru, you have got Satsang. Stop crying, there will be no more crying." And at the same time Hazur told Sant Kirpal Singh, "You love Sheila Ji as I did and take good care of her."
Even after this I was not fully convinced. Two months went by before I went to the Ashram. There I saw Tai Ji sitting in the kitchen while Master was in His room. I peeped in and saw that the room was full of Light, and Master was attending to His mail with His glasses on, sitting in the very same pose a Hazur used to sit. He then welcomed me with the same words as Hazur used when welcoming me. After this, when I saw such brilliant Light in the room, I absolutely forgot my body; I didn' know where I was. Master kept saying to me, "Look,you have no faith. If you still have doubts, keep on doing Simran, and if it stands before the Simran, then only believe." Then I saw that near the beard of Master Kirpal Singh there was the same black mole which Hazur had. Then I thought, "Oh, this is definitely the same Power!" And then Master put His hand under my chin and said, "Look up, look up, look up!" When I did, Maharaj Ji's eyes became those of Baba Sawan Singh. He told me, "Now, you must carry on the Satsang." I told Him, "Master, I am sorry; I have no strength left for Satsang. I am sorry, I cannot do it." Master took me to Dr. Mul Raj, and told him to give me a very good medicine. I said, "Master, my medicine is Your eyes. Whatever You say—It's all right."
Then one day the Master came for Satsang at a friend named Satya. It happened to be Divali Day. I was there thinking, "How fortunate is this family—the Master gives Satsang to them. If He comes to my home and gives Satsang I'd give anything for it. I'd be so blessed." Then I heard Master announce Sheila will be giving Satsang here from now on." I thought, what is this? Master announced this Himself!" All this happened in 1952 in Delhi. Then Master turned to me and said, Should I go to your home next?" It was my very wish; I had thought if He came to my place I would be willing to give away everything. Then Master repeated, "Should I go to your home?" He was answering my innermost prayer.
When the Master came, I noticed the room was full of radiant Light. He said,
"You want me to give Satsang? Come give me some text."
And He took up the very same hymn Hazur had used in the Satsang of which I dreamt:
"Satguru is ever present, never think that He is far away."
Maharaj then said, "Now, is there anything more? Do you want to give prashad? Come on, take out something, if there is parshad to be given." I said, "I'm sorry Master, there is nothing in the house." I wasn't prepared for all this. Then Master laughed, "Oh, so it was only talk, was it? Just talk." He was referring to what I had been saying to myself in my thoughts. Then He asked for water and had it. I ran to a small shop nearby and returned with burfi, and parshad was distributed. Then, having fulfilled my dearest wish, Master asked, "Is that all? Are you happy now? No complaints?" And He went back to the Ashram.
All this was in the early days of Maharaj Ji's Mission. From then on I became actively associated with Maharaj Ji's work and to the Ashram regularly.
Maharaj Ji did a great deal of traveling, and occasionally would ask me to join Him on tour. Once Maharaj Ji told me that He was going to Amritsar and asked me if I could go ahead, take the keys with me and get the place where He was to stay ready for Him and His party. Before leaving I told my husband that as Maharaj Ji would be away for over a week, he would do well to have His darshan next morning. When he went to Ashram and met Him, MaharajJi said something about coming illness in the family. My husband did not comprehend Maharaj Ji's meaning; he came back wondering what calamity lay ahead. Meanwhile I got to Amritsar, got everything ready, and Maharaj Ji arrived. After the program there, He had to proceed on tour. I was not scheduled to go with Him but when it was time to depart Tai Ji told me there was room for me in the car. What greater blessing could one pray for!
To be with Maharaj Ji is to be in eternity and time slips by so imperceptibly. The days flew past and we were already on our way back to Amritsar and from there back to Delhi. I was in the car, sitting in front with Des Raj and Master Pratap Singh; Kuku, Tai Ji, and Maharaj Ji were sitting behind. Suddenly Maharaj Ji asked me,
"Can you tell what hymn will be taken at Satsang at your place today? Why don't you close your eyes and try to see if you can tell?"
Tai Ji interrupted at this point "Maharaj Ji, if You go about getting people to turn within while we are on the road, how will we get them out? Please don't get started on things like this." Maharaj Ji changed the subject, but as we drove on I fell asleep and I found myself at home with a body laid out and people surrounding it in deep mourning. When I woke up, the scene was still vivid, but I decided to stay silent Maharaj Ji asked if I had seen anything; I did not answer.
The car suddenly stalled. We all got out. Des Raj fiddle. around and then got back behind the wheel and the engine started up again. We scrambled in, Kuku and Tai Ji in the back and Maharaj Ji getting in last by the left hand door; Des Raj, Master Pratap Singh and myself in front. I was the last to get in and as I banged my door shut, I did not realize that Maharaj Ji had placed His hand in the way and four of His fingers got jammed inside the bolted door. Imagine our shock and confusion I was too paralyzed to even think of opening the door. Tai Ji was beside herself at my carelessness, and Kuku was in tears. Des Raj jumped out of his seat, ran around, and opened the door. MaharajJi, as His left hand got released, sank back in His seat holding it in His right hand. He went pale, almost ash white, and it was as though He had given up the body. He lay in that posture for what seemed an eternity to us then, but could well have been in actuality five minutes or more. He then came back, and was all energy and cheer. Like a lion He bounded up, face glowing: "Why are you all crying?" He asked "Look, my hand is quite all right, just look, not a scratch, not drop of blood! Why all this confusion? You see I'm perfectly fine. Stop crying and be done with it. I assure you, just look at me, I am absolutely all right! And indeed there was not a scratch, not a sign of what He had gone through. His fingers hould have been crushed by the door, but they were in perfect shape as though nothing had happened. We started off again, but I was absolutely shaken. The dream I had just had, and now seeing what Maharaj Ji had suffered at my hands, I wondered what it was all about, what calamity it was that He was taking upon Himself.
It was fairly late in the evening when we got back to the Ashram and Hans Raj, who had gone to our place to conduct satsang with Maharaj Ji's tape, quietly whispered to Him that my husband was seriously ill. Maharaj Ji called me in and asked me if it wasn't best I return home. He did not tell me a thing, but as I was departing with Hans Raj, who was to drop me at home, Maharaj Ji casually pulled out a small bottle of homeopathic pills and said, "Why not take this? It might come in handy, headaches and things like that, you know."
When I reached home, it was an agonizing scene. My husband, who had been wondering all these days about Maharaj Ji's mysterious words about a family illness, had suddenly been taken ill that very day when he had gone to the office. He had a very acute pain in the abdomen and, taking a taxi, returned home. On the way he stopped at Sir Ganga Ram Hospital but they had no spare bed for him. He stoppped to consult some doctors, but all said he needed to be hospitalized, and they could not help him. Very possibly he needed an operation. There he was in great pain, and with no doctor willing to help. I got one of our neighboring medical practioners to come out and do his best. He sat by my husband's side all through the night. He was neither passing stools nor urine. We decided to move him to one of the larger hospitals in the morning. As the night wore on, I thought I would go and ring Maharaj Ji to let Him know. Just as I was leaving, I remembered the homeopathic pills and put some of them in my husband's mouth. I dashed off to phone. When I dialed the Ashram number it was Maharaj Ji who answered. I hurriedly told Him what had happened and that we were taking my husband to hospital.
"But surely you could delay it a little. I will be there in no time and you must wait till then,"
he told me.
I hurried back, and to my astonishment my husband was feeling better. The pills worked like magic and he passed his stool and urine. He was sitting up when Maharaj Ji arrived, and entering, He walked straight up to my husband and placed His right hand on his chest, cheering him with the words;
"Now what is wrong with you? What is all this talk about going to the hospital? You seem quite all right. Now look into my eyes, your perfectly all right. This will soon pass and you will be well again."
He instructed Dr. Mul Raj to carry on with homeopathic treatment, and cheering us all up, patted me and told me to be brave like the young one of a lion, and as He left, I thought of the scene I saw while half asleep in the car, Maharaj Ji's hand caught in the door of the car and His ashen face, the homeopathic pills that He had given me on arrival at Delhi and my husband's dire condition when I returned home.
Oh how can one sing of the marvelous grace of a Satguru!
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