Bette
Lee Sullivan
September 25,
1936 - April 23, 2007
April 24
As many of you already know, Bette died yesterday at 1020. Her
body could no longer tolerate the many assaults against every
major organ. I was there at her side, holding her close to me so that
she would not be afraid. Michael and Sandy, Kathleen, Annie, and Dan
and Kristen were all there at the end, surrounding her with love, and
feeling her love for all of us.
Bette and I were blest with the happiest of marriages. She has left me
with a lifetime of happy memories and, in spite of my sorrow, I must
count myself among the luckiest of men. I have been blest with her
unconditional love for 50 years and she has made my life a joy.
Throughout this difficult time the outpouring of love and prayers from
all of Bette's family and friends has been truly special. We
cannot thank you enough. I especially want to thank Annie for giving us
this website. It has been truly special.
My Bette is now in peace without pain and her love will sustain us.
Jerry
A funeral mass will be held on Saturday morning, April 28th at St. Agnes Church at 10am with a reception immediately following at the parish hall.
St. Agnes Church
1140 Evergreen St.
San Diego, CA 92106.
This website and guestbook will remain available for several weeks and Jerry will try to respond personally to all those that have left entries sometime in the future.
As most of you know, Bette Sullivan is seriously ill at UCSD's Thornton
Hospital here in San Diego. The purpose of this webpage is to help keep
people up-to-date on her condition and provide a guest book page that
you can all sign with your good wishes.
Given time and patience, we hope and pray she will be back to health
and happiness soon. If you can, please take a moment from your busy day
to offer up a prayer for her good health and please remember to give
thanks for your own and the health of those around you.
Saturday, April 21st
We have had several days of increasing concern while Mom has
struggled with breathing difficulties and an irregular heartbeat. This
morning the doctors inserted a chest tube to relieve fluid from around
her lungs. Since then, her condition appears to be somewhat more
stable, although it does remain grave.
We remain hopeful that there is still some chance of improvement.
If her condition remains stable through the weekend, the doctors are
tentatively planning another scan on Monday to try and find out what is
going on inside of her and possibly see if they can begin enteral
feeding instead of just IV feeding. If this is possible, it could be a
tremendous help, but for now we can only wait and hope and pray.
Our whole family would like to thank all of you out there for your
prayers and support. It has been a tremendous comfort and I hope that
Mom somehow knows just how many people are out there giving her their
love. My brothers and sister and I are also extremely grateful for the
love and support so many of you have given Dad. This is so hard on him
and it makes it much easier on us all to know that there are so many
people looking out for his health and welfare besides just ourselves.
May God bless all of you and your families and keep them safe.
Wednesday, April 18th
After a week of being relatively stable, Mom's condition has become
more tenuous. She had a CAT scan on Monday, which showed that she still
had some leaking within her intestinal tract, her liver function has
been declining and her kidneys failed a couple of weeks ago. Until
yesterday, her heart and lungs still seemed strong, but yesterday she
gave everyone a brief scare with an episode of atrial fibrillation.
This was quickly controlled with medication but her breathing and
oxygenation have deteriorated overnight.
Any of these situations alone could be controlled, but taken together,
her chances of survival are increasingly poor. The medical staff has
been wonderful throughout this and continue to do their very best to
try and improve her situration, but the clock and the calendar may
defeat us sooner rather than later.
Thank you for all of your continued support and prayers. Please
remember to also take the time to tell the people around you that they
are special and loved. We know that illness, accidental injury and
tragic death always come as a surprise, whether to young children or
older adults that have had a longer, joyful life. Whether Mom manages
to surprise us all to rally and fight back once again, or her body is
too tired to continue, I am very thankful that she knew that she was
loved and she made sure we knew her love for us.
Wednesday, April 11th
Dad had a long talk with the doctors and they discussed the good and
the bad going on. Her heart and lungs appear to be fine, but her
circulatory system is being entirely maintained by medication right now
and she is still not showing much progress. Basically she is stable,
and in kind of a holding pattern and this situation may continue for a
week or more before we see significant change.
Whatever happens in the future, please know that your thoughts and
prayers are appreciated as we all try to get through this difficult
time. It is especially hard for Dad and I would like to thank so many
of you for taking the time to give him encouragement and support. God
bless you all.
Monday, April 9th
Mom's condition has not significantly changed, which is becoming
worrying. Although she remains stable, the improvements are offset by
the risks inherent in remaining in a heavily supported environment.
Respirator dependency and IV nutrition are not good for long term
support. At this point, the situation could still go either way and the
trend will likely become more clear by the end of the week.
Please keep up your prayers and good thoughts. We all hope that she is
strong enough to continue fighting so that she can get well and spend
many more years with us, but whatever happens, we know she is getting
the best of care down here and is in good hands.
Saturday, April 7th
Although far from out of the woods, Mom is holding on and her condition
is very, very slowly improving. After a small scare early Friday
morning, she was put on a different type of dialysis that runs
continuously. This helps to keep her blood stable, and we hope that
stability will give her the time she needs to finally heal enough that
we can see her turn a corner before too many more days pass.
Have a safe and happy Easter and I hope you can all enjoy the company
of friends and family as we will.
Thursday, April 5th, 12 noon
The situation remains very serious, but not without hope. The doctors
today made it clear that Mom is as sick as a person can be and still be
alive. Her blood situation remains balanced as if on a tightrope,
between post-surgical bleeding and concern about the possibility of
unwanted blood clots. This will remain the biggest risk factor for
awhile. It is being treated medically, but it is just a very difficult
situation to treat or predict. Also, as expected with abdominal
surgery, she remains at high risk for infection.
But there is some good news, the most important being: she IS still
alive. Overnight her vital signs were stable and they were able to
reduce the oxygen from 100% back to 40% and her ventilation is working
well. She is not running a fever and her latest blood count was pretty
good. We are seeing improvement in tiny increments and remain hopeful
that she can hang on and continue to improve.
Realistically, there is still a very high chance that any of the many,
many risk factors could tip and we could lose her. We know that the
doctors are doing everything humanly possible to reduce the risks and
give her system the time it needs. Every minute and every hour her
chances are incrementally better and we pray for enough time to start
tipping the balance back in her favor.
I hope that you all will remain optimistic and try not to worry too
much. Even though the situation is dire, Mom is in good hands and we
can be hopeful that she will continue to see improvement over the next
few days.
Wednesday, April 4th 11:30pm
The surgery began at about 2:40pm and lasted over 5 hours. The doctors
did not believe she had very much chance of surviving the surgery, but
she had basically no chance without it. There is no question that she
is still in very critical condition and her chances are still not very
good, but so far, she is holding on.
The doctors were very surprised with what they found during the
surgery. The gall bladder (which they were thankfully able to remove)
was clear of stones, but there were two stones in the duodenum. They are
uncertain exactly where these came from, but they were very large
stones in a very small space and one had penetrated the duodenal wall.
They cleared out the stones and closed off the hole, then they
inspected the lower intestine to make sure there were no other holes
and removed the gall bladder.
Because of her seriously weakened condition, she was -- and remains --
a very high risk patient. The first concern after the surgery involves
blood. She had a low blood count and low clotting ability before the
surgery and they have transfused a lot of blood. They are watching her
closely to make sure there is no further internal bleeding from the
surgery, and to improve her blood count and clotting ability. At the
same time, they need to watch carefully to make sure her blood does not
start creating unwanted clots, which could also kill her.
In addition to this immediately critical concern, there are many other
risk factors -- infection, breathing difficulties and the failure of
her kidneys. This is not to say her situation is hopeless. She did make
it through surgery and the root cause of her continuing deterioration
has apparently been taken care of. These points are strongly in her
favor and the medical team at Thornton Hospital is doing everything
they can to help give her the chance to continue fighting.
Be stubborn and keep fighting, Mom. We love you and are praying for you.
Wednesday, April 4th 2:30pm
Bette is going in for emergency surgery this afternoon. We know that
she is safe in God's hands, but we also pray that he will help keep her
strong so that she can come back to us for many more healthy years.
Please join us in our prayers. Thank you.
Thanks to all of you. God bless you all.
Tuesday, April 3rd
In a case of no (or very little) news is good news, things are
progressing very, very slowly, but they seem to be going in the right
direction. A quiet night with no problems have given way to a peaceful
day today. Bette's condition remains stable and she appear to be taking
baby steps towards recovery now. Her white count is still very high,
but the fluids are draining well and hopefully we will see a change in
that. More dialysis is planned for tomorrow (as expected). Hopefully
she will soon be strong enough to try tube feeding again (instead of
the IV) and maybe start to weaning her off of the respirator at the end
of the week? There is no timeline here, and we know progress will be
slow.
Jerry says he will be very happy when they can ease off the sedation so
that she can wake up a bit and he can see her eyes again. His children
will be happy when we see him relaxed enough about her condition to
feel safe enough to take a break for basketball or working on the house
or even just sitting on his boat for a little while. When that happens,
we will feel that she has really turned a corner.
Monday evening
Dad called and said that they made some changes to the abdominal
drainage -- basically streamlined all the external plumbing -- and now
they have a goodly amount of fluid draining from the places it
shouldn't be. Things are definitely more positive and we are hoping for
an even better day tomorrow. If that fluid gets out of the way the
antibiotics can start doing their work and hopefully we will see a
lower white count within a couple of days!
Hi to all from Jerry and thanks for your support!
Monday, April 2nd
No great leaps, but after yesterday's rough outing, I am very happy to
say that Mom is stable and much more comfortable today. Her numbers
look better and she is resting more easily. It may not seem like much
progress, but it is definitely a big relief that she is still in there
and fighting back hard.
Last night's cat scan turned up a large amount of fluid in Bette's
chest cavity and at 1am this morning the medical team put a chest tube
in and removed another 2 liters of fluid. Today she is resting much
more comfortably. This afternoon the radiology team is reviewing the
previous scans again to try and figure out why the abdominal tube is
not draining as much as they expected. This seems surprising, when you
consider they previously removed 3 liters(!) there, but there is still
a large amount of nasty fluid pooling that needs to be cleared out to
let her fight this. The most likely plans at this point are to
reposition that abdominal drain or possibly put in a larger tube.
Thankfully, there is no indication that emergency surgery might be
imminent.
Thank you all for your prayers and continued support, they are
definitely helping. Her pulse, blood pressure and temperature are all
holding stable now, her oxygen levels are much better and, with the
help of the chest tube, the doctors were able to cut back the nearly
100% oxygen concentration now that she can absorb it better. Still very
sick, but we will take every bit of hope we can get.
A special thanks to the staff of the Thornton Hospital critical care
unit. You are all fantastic and wonderful and I can't think of high
enough praise for the great job you are doing.
April 1st, evening
Bette's condition has deteriorated further and she has had some
breathing problems today. She is on a high concentration (almost 100%)
of oxygen to keep her going. The medical team is doing an ultrasound
and may do another scan tomorrow, although they would like to avoid
futher dye.
Please keep Bette in your prayers tonight. She is not through with this
fight and she can use all the help we can give her. Thank you.
April 1st
Two steps forward and one step back. Bette had a fairly good day
yesterday and was more alert, although still very tired. Today is not
quite as good. Less alert and her white count is up, although
fortunately there is no fever right now. Despite the current drainage
tubes, fluid is still building up and the doctors are trying to find
the best way to drain more off, possibly larger drainage tubes --
hopefully avoiding surgery. Another cat scan this morning, followed by
dialysis to clean out the blood, since the kidneys are still not
functioning much.
Hopefully the new test will pinpoint where the fluid is coming from to
help drain it better. On a positive note, the analysis of the fluid
previously removed has helped them find the particular type of bacteria
and they know the right antibiotics to treat this. Unfortunately, the
fluid still there remains a breeding ground for more bacteria and it is
hard for the antibiotics to get in and kill the bacteria inside that
soup. It is very important to drain that fluid more efficiently, so
that the antibiotics can get in to do their work.
March 30th
Bette had a good night last night and her condition is fairly stable.
The removal of all of that fluid yesterday has helped her condition.
She is still sedated and on IV feeding and has an elevated white count
that the doctors are trying to find the cause of. She may have another
scan tomorrow to see if they can find more information about it.
March 29th
Better news today, as well as somewhat of a surprise. The doctors put a
tube in to drain the excess fluid and were surprised to find it was
more than 3 liters! The release of that pressure made an immediate
difference and her heartbeat is now staying down below 100 for the
first time in several days (it is normally around the 90s for her, so
that is actually pretty good).
Next they need to find out where all that fluid came from and figure
out how to plug the leak if it is still there. They will know more
about that tomorrow, althouth it will take a few days to fully analyze
the contents so that they can zero in on any bacteria they find and
target it with the best antibiotics for that particular bug.
Although she is still very sick, overall today was another step forward
in getting her back to good health. Thank you for all your prayers and
support.
March 28th
The news is not so good today. Bette is very sick and has been further
sedated so that she is not conscious at all. The medical team did a cat
scan today to try and find the cause of her elevated white count. She
has a buildup of fluid around her liver and around her lungs that make
it difficult to breathe, and there is apparently some kind of mass or
swelling on her pancreas. Surgery is a possibility, but the doctors
will probably not make a decision about this until tomorrow; there
would be significant risk in surgery because she is not very strong.
One decision they did make is to remove the feeding tube because it was
very hard on her. She will be on intravenous feeding probably beginning
tomorrow.
Please keep praying for her.
March 27th
The news today is fairly positive. As expected, the doctors did decide
on a dialysis treatment today and although it is not great that she
needs it, the good news is that her body tolerated the treatment well
and also that her fever is down this evening. Still a long way to go,
but this is definitely the direction we hope to see.
March 26th
Bette was taken to the hospital on March 18th suffering from severe
pain of what appeared to be a gall bladder attack, of which she has a
history. She was diagnosed as having developed acute
pancreatitis, brought on by chronic gall bladder problems. The pancreas is part of
the endocrine system and is critical to regulate blood glucose and
control the digestive system.
Initially she was in a regular room, but her condition worsened due to
shock and an increasingly unbalanced blood chemistry. She was moved to
ICU on March 19th but continued to worsen with blood pressure problems
and loss of function of her kidneys. Finally the doctors decided to
sedate her and place here on a respirator to give her body a chance to
fully rest and try to recover as they attempted to restore the proper
balance to her blood chemistry.
Her blood chemistry has improved tremendously and over the weekend the
medical staff started to take her off the sedation in the hope of
removing her from the respirator shortly. On Sunday she was groggy but
somewhat responsive, able to nod or shake her head at yes/no questions
and smiling slightly at our bad jokes.
Unfortunately she started running a fever last night which is a
concern. Since her kidneys are still not functioning sufficiently, the
doctor has decided that dialysis is a likely course of treatment
beginning tomorrow to help remove the poisons from her blood and help
her to fight better.
Right now, she is in a wonderful hospital surrounded by a truly
fantastic staff. They are fighting hard to give her the edge she needs
to fight this and get back on her feet. They are taking great care of
Jerry as he spends many hours by her side.
Thanks to all of the great people at Thornton Hospital! There are not
enough words to say how much we appreciate the great job you are doing.