The Rules of Conservative Correctness


[version 1.2] I considered making some changes in these, however finally determined that a completely NEW page should be created, the Guide To Dittohead E-mail Etiquette, to show exactly what kind of techniques are used in dealing with them. The link is at the bottom of the page, along with other useful links.
Now, this is the originals, presented in a chance to see what these folks are soooo uptight about.
Here's a little something that I developed in "debating" (which resembles real debate like using an AK-47 for hunting resembles "sport") dittoheads. ALL the information is taken from the responses and activities of various "neo-conservatives" (I can't call them Conservatives, they AIN'T) on local BBSes.


Now, in the interests of "equal time", here are:
The Rules of Conservative Correctness:
1) if anyone disagrees with you, they are a "Democrat"

2) if anyone argues with you, they are a "Liberal"

3) if they argue with you and actually present data (formerly known as "debating"), shrug it off as "propaganda from the Liberal Media"

4) if you cannot rebut the argument pick on details such as misspellings,improper punctuation or taglines

5) If your opponent has an unrefutable argument, change the subject

6) if your opponent consistently overturns your "correct" stories (anything told by Rush Limbaugh), use ad hominem attacks.

7) anyone who puts life over profits is a "tree hugger"

8) anyone who refutes or debates "correct" science (CreationismIntelligent Design, Ecological Stability) is a "sky-is-falling" reactionary

9) anyone who opposes the melding of religion and government is one of the "liberals" who helped create the rampant immorality today

10) any federal program created by a Democrat, or that "looks" Democratic is "socialistic".

11) dismantling programs and restrictions on spending then sending the money to states as a "block grant" is better than having a standardized Federal program with rules

12) giving tax money to People is "enslaving them", giving tax money to Corporations is "making jobs"

13) anything that does not turn a profit for private corporations is "an elitist" operation

14) always take everything personally

15) whatever your weakness is, blame it on your opponent

16) the more narrow and prejudiced your sources, the more you project that onto your opponent

17) when your opponent attacks a Republican/conservative President's policies, blame them on a Democratic Congress (or vice versa)UPDATE: the Activist Judges

18) when quoting your opponent, edit his words to conform to "correctness"

19) anyone who reads anything beyond "the Limbaugh Letter" is an "ivory towerpointy headed intellectual"

20) when all else fails, lie



Flaming

Dittohead Email Ettiquette
The Rules of Neoconservative Correctness{you are here}
Creative Insulting

Debate

On Debating
Fallacies
Ad Absurdum
Patriotically Incorrect Humor

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Update: Monday January 16, 2006 10:32 PM