Page 6

Ode from a miserable old bag to her Darling Husband, who thinks all mamas should resemble b. b. ---- 1964

[BEBE- stands for Brigette Bardot, sex goddess]

Oh, my days of Glory sprinted

The first time that you hinted

My waistline wasn't 'dented'

I AM THIRTY - FIVE !

Yes, you laugh about my shape

For I'm shaped just like a Grape

[But in Brooklyn that is 'Drape']

I AM THIRTY - FIVE !

I have eluded scabies

And avoided rabies

And had lots of babies

I AM THIRTY - FIVE !

With my stomach muscles sagging,

Personality is lagging

So I'll give up bragging

I AM THIRTY - FIVE !

And the fact strikes like a hammer

That, amidst the household clamor,

I cannot have much glamour

I AM THIRTY - FIVE !

Oh, My tummy isn't flat

And Iv'e got some extra fat,

But who's the cause of that?

I AM THIRTY - FIVE !

So stop your criticizing -

Let me keep on hypnotizing

Myself and my UP-SIZING

For I'll soon be THIRTY - SIX!

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