I don't know what the title of this entry should be

I found out today that my dad has melanoma. It has been a rough day. My mom called me this afternoon and told me, and then I called my dad to get more info. He said that the doctors want to go in and make sure they cut it all out and that they will let him know in a few days what stage the cancer is at. I am so scared. Petrified. I don't know what to do, or how I should be feeling but I cried so much today. I went to class and by the end of it I just felt numb. Jered has been really supportive, we talked about all the what ifs, its nice to have someone who understands. Sometimes its just awful when people tell you "Everything is going to be okay" I know that it is said with the best of intentions, but when you're scared it just doesn't seem right. I don't know if that makes any sense. I feel like saying to people, what if it won't be okay? What then?
My dad is so positive too, he's the eternal optimist, but I suppose at some level i know he must be scared too. Its hard for me to see him try to be strong and positive, I don't want to let him see me upset by this, and I don't really want him to know that i'm scared. My parents haven't told my brother or sister yet. I wish they would sooner rather than later but that is their decision to make.

I don't know what else to say...