Sadness...

Well, Oscar was neutered on Wednesday and everything was going fine until Thursday afternoon. He had a seizure at the vet's office yesterday and they told us to watch him as he might be reacting after all the anesthetic. He had another seizure last night at 6:15, and another one at 11:05 that was terrible. He convulsed and lost complete control and didn't come out of it for minutes. It was the most terrible thing I've ever seen happen to an animal.
This morning he had another small seizure at 7:30. So I decided to take him back to the vet. They are running tests on him all day today to try and figure out what is going on. Apparently his glucose levels are fine, so we are now just waiting on the bloodwork to come back.
I started crying at the vet's office. I couldn't help myself. I never cry! Seriously, only when I am really really upset, but here I was crying because I'm stressed over the bills and how quickly they are adding up (first a neuter and a teeth clean and a full physical, now bloodwork and bajillions of other tests). He started as a $50 dog, and now has already cost us upwards of $600. Needless to day, we don't have that kind of money. I hate to bring money into a discussion about my feelings but it has been extremely stressful knowing that he might be really sick and we might not be able to care for him.
The SPCA didn't tell us anything about the fact that he might be epileptic! The vet is saying that there is a 95% chance that he is. I just want to get everything figured out so that we can get him well and start to enjoy having a dog.
Today has been extremely stressful. I didn't sleep much last night because I wanted to be sure to hear him if he had a seizure, and then today has been very very emotional. I'm feeling sad because the poor little guy is just helpless when he has these seizures and there's nothing we can do but wait for him to come out of it and clean up after him afterwards (they can be very messy), guilty for indulging my impulsive side and adopting Oscar, and ashamed that I'm even worried about money...
It has been a rough day.
I think I will be doing some therapeutic knitting this weekend. I haven't picked up Madli's Shawl in over two months, and I think now is a great time to focus on something that really will grab my attention and put my mind on something other than worrying.
I also was able to get through the first 5 pages of a 10 page paper. I guess worry has fueled me to get things done. Might as well do something with the nervous energy. We pick Oscar up tonight at 5. I'll try to post an update later. Keep him in your thoughts.