Happy Home

I remember the pain in my mother's eyes,
I remember the pain of her compromise years ago.
I always wanted to help to make it go away,
I didn't know it was her freedom that she needed so.

And she said to me, she said to me:

He hitch-hiked to Maine,
We went cross-country,
I had to leave my home,
I had to raise a family,
We did the best we could being so young,
We tried so hard to build a happy home.

I never knew what to say to anybody,
I didn't know what to do, I was far too young.
But everybody could feel the suffocation,
Underneath the facade of a happy home.

And she said to me, she said to me:

(Chorus)

Home sweet freedom, flowing in my eyes,
Home sweet freedom, flowing in my mind.

Sacrificed her dreams to motherhood,
Waiting and waiting to be understood fully.
Sacrificed her years to the family,
Waiting and waiting to be heard finally.

And she said to me, she said to me...

I Am So Ordinary

I nearly died I suicided softly
I saw her shadow through the cafe window
I watched you lean across the table
I watched you whisper in her ear

And she is your holy Mary
And I am so ordinary
And you can use me if you want to
I know you need me just like an old soft shoe

She looks like me but a bit prettier
She's a skater and a ballet dancer
I saw her on your motorcycle
In the seat I thought was meant for me

(Chorus)

And when your mother came to Boston you disappeared
And then I saw you three together
I guess she makes the best impression
With her charming feminitity...

(Chorus)

Oh but I am the one you will call when alone
And I am the one who will give when she's gone
And so I give
So I give

I tell myself that love is truly giving
Somehow I justify this
Hoping you will understand me
Hoping you will love me back

And she is your holy Mary
And I am so ordinary
And she is your Queen Cleopatra
And I'm just your morning after
And she is your Star Spangled Banner
And I am just Frere Jacque
And you can lose me if you want to.

And I am so ordinary.

Saturn Girl

Lost in another world, oh Saturn, Saturn Girl.

Far away, to an infinite world I escape
I'm clear and calm, I'm unafraid.
Sunless days, in my sheltered Milky Way
In Saturn's rings I feel no pain.

In my heart, in my head
Oh the Saturn Girl has always bled
No you're not, from this world
Saturn Girl.

I can't explain, why I don't belong to the same world
I don't fit in, and I will not stay.
I want to fly, oh I long for my violet skies
My astral nights, my peace of mind.

(Chorus)

Lost in another world, oh Saturn, Saturn Girl.
Saturn Girl, I'd rather be lost in my empyrean world
Than be down on earth.

(Chorus)

Everybody tries to break my dreams to break through,
They don't believe in my words, they don't believe in my world.
"Oh you're lost you Saturn Girl, oh you crazy girl.
Oh you Saturn Girl"...

(Chorus)

Watch The Woman's Hands

Watch the woman's hands as she cultivates the land,
As she plants the seed, as she's on her knees.
Watch her fingers smile as she holds the little child,
As she holds him, as she holds him.

Watch the woman's hands as she holds her children back,
>From the danger, from the danger.
Watch how they fight to keep the family tight
Together, together.

Oh we need her, oh we need her.
Oh we need her, oh we need her.

Watch the woman's hands, as she talks to the man,
As he talks down to her, as he tells her.
He doesn't understand, he doesn't see the fisted
Clenching tightly, angrily.

Oh we need her, oh we need her.
Oh we need her, oh we need her.

Bethlehem

Pulling on the apron strings looking up
Standing on the chair to be grown up
I feel so little, I need my pillow
I hate time, I hate the clock
I want to be a dog, or I want to be a rock

Sunday's pancakes Miss Mary Mack
Color Polaroid's show my heart attack
In my second hand pants and dusty shoes
The day that the playground laughed at my shoes

It's my birthday next week and what I want please
Is to turn on the heat so the fish won't freeze
The fish in the tank froze and died last week
Oh I want to be a dog or I want to be a leaf

Quarry miners, fishermen
In my town of Bethlehem
Picket fences, church at ten
No star above my Bethlehem

Now I'm only 16 and I think I have an ulcer
I'm hiding my sex behind a dirty sweatshirt
I've lost five pounds these last few days
Trying to be class president and get straight A's,
well,
Who gives a shit about that anyway?
I just want to be a dog or a lump of clay

(Chorus)

Still I'm tired of standing still
Tired of living -- still
Everyday I dream of leaving

Everybody's talking about Becky's bust
The boys on the basketball team just fuck
The same ten girls, who don't know who they are
They're looking for some comfort in the back of a car
The six-packs of beer, the locker room jeers
I don't want to be me, I don't want to be here

(Chorus)

Red brick school house, dead end dirtroads, daffodils
No star above my Bethlehem

I want to be a dog or I want to be a rock
I don't want to be me, I don't want to be here in
Bethlehem

Chiaroscuro

(ke-ar -p-skoor o: the relationship of darkness and light in a painting or pictorial setting.)

Goya and El Greco, Gaugin and Van Gogh
Painted light in darkness, chiaroscuro
Imagine we were a painting
A woman and a man,
Two lovers on the canvas
One is white, one is black.

Darkness and light will be married tonight in chiaroscuro,
Your body on mine -- two colors combined in chiaroscuro.
Vermeer and Velazquez, Rembrandt and Rousseau
Painted perfect union, chiaroscuro
The man and the wonam
The knife and the spoon
The xylem and the phloem
The sun and the moon

(Chorus)

How we lived a secret life from racist eyes
You said I couldn't understand you anyway I tried

But in this moment together, in our secret unity
Our skins become the still life, our souls epiphany

(Chorus)

Black Boots

Why do you think she wears those black boots...
Why do you think she dyes her hair black...

She's awfully insecure
She's trying to be cool
She's hoping to be more in those,
black boots.

Why do I think I wear those black boots...
Why do I wear three pairs of black boots...

I feel a little stronger
I feel a little taller
I identify with the color
I like myself in these
black boots.

Oh John

Oh John, oh John, oh John

Never lose the memory of April twenty six
Your hands designed my body
You autographed my hip
I lost all my worry
I lost all sense of time
My fears evaporated
When you held me in your oh my god and

Oh John, in a New York hotel room
in a truck off the back road
Southwest of Chicago
Oh John, in a New England fairground
on a lawn in the backyard
in a town in Colorado, oh
Oh John, oh John, oh John

Saturate my consciousness with sweet elixir wine
Your body is the chalice your spirit is the vine
I lose all my worry
I lose all sense of time
My fears evaporate
When you hold me in your oh my god and

(Chorus)

And everytime I see the ocean you're there
And everytime I see the forest you're on my mind
In my life, flooding me with memories like

(Chorus)

Our Revenge

Walking the mountain is easy for the medicine
Man who follows makes sure the Indian
Never returns.

His revenge, his revenge
Rising
His revenge, his revenge
Rising

Fighting the front line is honor for the pharaoh in
Egypt erases the queen, the truth, the history
of her

Her revenge, her revenge
Rising
Her revenge, her revenge
Rising

Reading the pages of history it's not black and
White is the man with the pen who's writing the story
Of life.

Our revenge, our revenge rising
Our revenge, our revenge rising
Our revenge, our revenge rising
Our revenge, our revenge rising, rising, rising, rising

Dear Gertrude

Tell me how the story will unfold,
I know you see everything.
Tell me all about the torch and scroll,
I know you know everything.

So why do you come to me?
Why when I'm sleeping?
Why am I the only one who knows you're
there?
Why, why?

My dear, my dear Gertrude,
My dear, lonely soul.
My dear, my dear Gertrude,
My dear, my dear, my dear.

Tell me all about your history,
Tell me all about your pains.
Try to contact all your lost loved one,
Try to speak to them through me.

So why do you come to me?
Why when I'm sleeping?
Why am I the only one who knows you're
there?
Why, why?

(Chorus)

You're so lonely in my body,
I can sympathize your pain,
But this secret is too much
for me to hold,
No, no one will believe.

Hitler's Brothers

Little boy, tries to hide,
>From the fire in his backyard.
Burning cross, white cloth,
It's the second time this year.

Hitler's Brothers are still alive,
They're wearing everyday disguises.

A woman runs, for asylum,
She's the only one of her kind in this neighborhood.
She knows who they were,
They don't believe a word,
The cops just turn their heads to protect their friends.

Hitler's Brothers are still alive,
Their army seems to grow in size,
Hitler's Brothers are on the rise,
They're wearing everyday disguises.
...In camouflage or business suits.

Another man, bound and gagged,
Tied upon the railroad tracks.
At nine pm, the B & M (Boston & Maine)
Rolled across his yellow skin.

Hitler's Brothers are still alive,
Their army seems to grow in size,
Hitler's Brothers are on the rise,
They're wearing everyday disguises.
In camouflage or business suits,
Checkered aprons, combat boots,
Time to let those feelings go,
Hatred only kills your souls.

She Can't Feel Anything Anymore

She was on the floor, her face was in her mother's arms,
She had said that she'd been out late with the boys.
Just another evening, like every other evening
Everything is all the same it seems.

Danny always called her on the phone for no special reason,
apparently,
He could never tell her what it was he suffered silently,
quietly.

Just another evening, but his hands just can't be still,
He can't control it and he cannot tell her why,
Feel the beaded knuckles, feel the snap inside,
See the rush of terror in her eye,
She can't feel it
She can't feel it
She can't feel anything anymore

He tried painfully, he begged for her forgiveness on his knees,
She gave gracefully, but inside,
but inside,
She still bleeds.

Garden Of Eden

Here I am, a black-eyed bird, remaining silent.
I simply watdch, your little life from high above.
Wanting to call you, wanting to sing,
Inside youre ears and lips and eyes and soul,
I'll dig my grave, behind the gates of Babylon.

There's a Garden of Eden
In your distant heart,
Garden of Eden
In your earthly arms.

Here I stand, a serpent queen of the garden,
I'm beckoning, but you ignore my siren song.
Oh I long, to youch you, to step inside your sacred gate,
I'll dig my grave in the mine of golden bible snake.

There's a Garden of Eden
In your distant heart,
Garden of Eden
In your earthly arms.

The black-eyed bird is dying,
The queen is dead,
She'll never step foot in Eden.

There's a Garden of Eden
In your distant heart,
Garden of Eden
In your earthly arms.

The Ladder

Climbing, climbing, climbing,
climbing...

Look, at how futile this is,
I'm so weak, so fragile, so torn.
Going round and round, going inside
To the circle, to the ladder, to the sky.

I am climbing a ladder of urgency
Climbing a ladder of hope
Climbing a ladder of my emotions
Climbing a ladder of unraveling rope.

You see, what you want to see,
But I'm not, what you wnated, no I'm not.
I am only one thing, one thing I see,
One thing I feel.

(Chorus)

Climbing...
I am only one thing, one thing I see, one
thing I feel
I am the ladder.

Tiger

Where do I put this fire?
This bright red feeling?
This tiger lily down my mouth?
He wants to grow to twenty feet tall.

(chorus)

I've left Bethlehem and I feel free.
I've left the girl I was supposed to be
And somehow I'll be born.

I'm so tired of being shy, I'm not that girl anymore
I'm not that straight "A" anymore.
Now I want to sit with my legs wide open and
Laugh so loud that the whole damned restaurant
will turn and look at me.
"Look at that tiger jumping out of her mouth!"

(chorus)

No more sex-starved teachers trying to touch my ass
I can finally be a teenager at age 26.
Go to hell lions, tigers and bears -- I'm not afraid
of you anymore
My fear broke apart like fifty balloons and I'm
throwing it around the room like confetti now.

(chorus)

And someday I'll be born.........

Where Have All The Cowboys Gone?

Oh you get me ready in your 56 Chevy
Why don't we go sit down in the shade?
Take shelter on my front porch
The dandelion sun scorched,
Would you like a glass of cold lemonade?

I will do the laundry if you pay all the bills.

Where is my John Wayne?
Where is my prairie sun?
Where is my happy ending?
Where have all the Cowboys gone?

Why don't you stay the evening
Kick back and watch the TV
And I'll fix a little somethin' to eat?
Oh I know your back hurts from working on the tractor
How do you take your coffee my sweet?

I will raise the children if you pay all the bills

(Chorus)

I am wearing my new dress tonight
But you don't even notice me.
Say our goodbyes
Say our goodbyes
Say our goodbyes

We finally sold the Chevy
When we had another baby
And you took that job in Tennessee
You made friends at the farm
And you joined them at the bar
Almost every single day of the week

I will wash the dishes while you go have a beer.

Where is my John Wayne?
Where is my prairie sun?
Where is my happy ending?
Where have all the Cowboys gone?
Where is my Marlboro Man?
Where is his shiny gun?
Where is my lonely ranger?
Where have all the cowboys gone?

Yippee Aw, Yippee Yea
Yippee Aw, Yippee Yea
Yippee Aw, Yippee Yea

Throwing Stones

So call me a bitch in heat and I'll call you a liar,
And we'll throw stones until we're dead.

There you go again, you cut me off from talking
You bask in the glory, the center of the circle.
All our friends think you are a comedian --
so kind and generous, but I am suffering
Away from here, I want to be away from here,
Away from every little thing. I used to love
your every little thing.

Now you call me a bitch in heat and I'll call you a liar,
And we'll throw stones until we're dead.

You're the puppeteer and I'm the puppet,
You manipulate me with guilt-ridden Catholic Chit.
Everytime I try to talk it through you turn it around
And make us out to be David and Goliath.
Away from here, I want to be away from here,
Away from every little thing. I used to love
Your every little thing.

Your arms beneath me, your light inside me
I used to love your every little thing.
Your eyes blue stars, your hand in my purse,
Now I hate your every little thing.

Oh mama I didn't know life was this hard.
Oh mama my innocence has been tarred
My inner vision dulled and darkened
I gave myself away to you,
I felt my sorrow humble me and throw my crown
upon the ground
It was you I hoped for and
us I prayed for and
me that I believed was wrong
But now my anger is my best friend and careful,
I may bite your head off.

So call me a bitch in heat and I'll call you a liar
And we'll throw stones until we're dead.
So call me a bitch in heat and I'll call you motherfucker
And we'll throw stones until we're dead.

Carmen

(chorus)

Carmen, I don't know if I can go back.
Carmen, I'll never be the same again.
Carmen, Carmen, Carmen......

The way you set the table
The way you lean into tell me something soft.
The way I can see into you.
The way you tell me I talk too much about myself,
It's true, I talk too much about myself,
But right now I want to talk about you now.

(chorus)

I love the way you think
Is it biological or all the acid you've eaten?
Just take me to your body,
I want to be high I want to be drunk
I want to be high on you.

Mississippi

I'm big and proud all over, not just on the stage
My secret self has many sides that laugh and crash and stare
I'm red and thick like fire. I like it from behind.
But ram to lamb and red and white,
I'm pure and sad and silent.

(chorus)

I've got a piece of my heart on the sole of your shoe,
I've got a little bit of thunder trapped inside of that cloud
That dog in you spit me out into the Mississippi.

Who would love my many selves,
The wife, the bitch, the rapunzel?
The one who cries and calls for you,
the one who is always alone?

(chorus)

Oh Mississippi come and wash me away
Oh Mississippi come and take my pain away
I feel I'm drowning
I feel I'm.....dying.

Neitzsche's Eyes

How many times did I have to hear you say to me,
"Self obsessed artist. Center of your universe."
Well I believed your every word,
And I believed you were my god.

Neitzsche's Eyes, Neitzsche's kite,
failed in flight to us
And oh my love.......

Grandmother, mother, and now I see it in myself,
I take on the water until the dam threatens to break
I became a little doll.
My voice became too small.

Neitzsche's Eyes, Neitzsche's kite,
failed in flight to us
And oh my love......I'm shaken
I'm getting down this fantasy
I'm shaken. You were not my superman.

I didn't know just how I felt.
Oh my love, I'm getting down this.
You were not my superman.

I wasn't honest, I tried to philosophize
Only too late did I see
That I wore Neitzsche's Eyes
Now that I step back to see,
I haven't been me.

Neitzsche's Eyes, Neitzsche's kite,
Failed in flight to us.
And oh my love, I'm shaken.
I'm getting down this --
Getting down this,
Getting down this.......

Road To Dead

Welcome to the church of me
Where they stand in a line in need
Of water from my eyes and a song for comfort.
You say Jesus Christ, well I feel like him.
I feel one, two, three nails through me,
And four, through the heart.

(chorus)
You walk the road to resurrection
And I walk the road to dead
And I've given you my devotion,
But I walk the road to dead.

I held you up and wrapped you in the heat of my hand
And prayed for us.
But now I watch your back as you
Walk away from my life.
You need need. Strength is threatening.
So I filled you with faith, and I filled me with pain,
And what the hell am I doing falling in love
With pain again and again and again and again?

(chorus)

Me

I am not the person who is singing,
I am the silent one inside.
I am not the one who laughs at people's jokes,
I just pacify their egos.
I am not my house, my car or my songs,
They are only stops along my way.
I am like the winter, I'm a dark cold female,
With a golden ring of wisdom in my cave.

(chorus)

And it's me who is my enemy
Me who beats me up
Me who makes the monsters
Me who strips my confidence

I am carrying my voice
I am carrying my heart.
I am carrying my rhythm
I am carrying my prayers,
tha you can kill my spirit, it's old and it is strong,
And like a mountain I'll go on and on.
But when my wings are folded,
The brightly colored moth blends into the dirt into the ground

And it's me who is my enemy.
Me who beats me up.
Me who makes the monsters.
Me who strips my confidence.
And it's me who's too weak,
And it's me who's too shy to ask for the thing I love.
But I love

I am walking on the bridge,
I am over the water,
And I'm scared as hell
But I know there's something better.

(chorus)

Feelin' Love

You make me feel like a sticky pistil
Leaning into her stamen.
You make me feel like Mr. Sunshine himself.
You make me feel like splendor in the grass where we're rolling
Damn skippy baby
you make me feel like the Amazon's running between my thighs.

You make me feel love<

You make me feel like a candy apple all red and horny
You make me feel like I want to be dumb blonde
In a centerfold, the girl next door.
And I would open the door and I'd be all wet
With my tits soaking through this tiny little t-shirt
That I'm wearing and you would open the door
And tie me up to the bed.

You make me feel love

Lover I don't know who I am.
Am I Barry White - am I Isis?
Lover I'm laced with your unconscious,
I will be your Desdemona

Hush, Hush, Hush

Long white arms losing their strength and form,
Sixty year man on twenty year old skin.
Skeleton your eyes have lost their warmth,
And look to your father for some support.

(chorus)

Hush, hush, hush....says your Daddy's touch.
Sleep, sleep, sleep....says the hundredth sheep
Peace, peace, peace....May you go in peace.

Cruel joke you waited so long to show,
The one that you wanted wasn't a girl.
All your life you kept it hidden inside,
Now when you step, you stumble, you die.

(chorus)

Oh maybe next time you'll be Henry the Eighth
Wake up tomorrow Alexander the Great.
Open your eyes in a new life again.
Oh maybe next tme you'll be given a chance.

Hush, hush, hush.........

I Don't Want To Wait

So open up your morning light,
And say a little prayer for I.
you know that if we are to stay alive.
Then see the peace in every eye.

She had two babies. One was six months, one was three
In the war of '44.
Every telephone ring, every heartbeat stinging
When she thought it was God calling her.
Oh would her son grow to know his father?

(chorus)

I don't want to to wait for our lives to be over,
I want to know right now what will it be.
I don't want to wait for our lives to be over,
Will it be yes or will it be sorry?

He showed up all wet on the rainy front step.
Wearing shrapnel in his skin.
And the war he saw lives inside him still,
It's so hard to be gentle and warm.
The years pass by and now he has granddaughters

(chorus)

You look at me from across the room
You're wearing your anguish again
Believe me I know the feeling
It sucks you into the jaws of anger.
So breathe a little more deeply my love
All we have is this very moment
And I don't want to do what his father,
and his father, and his father did,
I want to be here now.

So open up your morning light,
And say a little prayer for I
You know that if we are to stay alive,
Then see the love in every eye.

It is possible that some errors may be present in these lyrics. I would certainly appreciate getting feedback should you discover any mistakes.