SECONDARY ELEMENTS
Multiple sources have also suggested the importance of other elements.
Cutting words - "kireji" refers to
breaks and pauses in the haiku. In Japanese haiku they use actual cutting
words or kireji (rather like the use of "stop" in telegraphs) to indicate
where the break should be. In English, kireji are replaced with dashes,
commas, or implied breaks. Typically the flow of the poem is split into
two parts. This is called "the fragment and phrase" and it helps to avoid
run-on sentences in your poem. Basically, the idea is that the first line
of the poem is a fragment, the remaining two lines go together in a phrase.
For example:
A chill in the wind -- (fragment)
Suddenly my cat grows fond (phrase)
Of sleeping indoors
Time Element - We discussed the effects
of kigo on a world-wide basis. Some have suggested that rather than "season
words" poets should use more universal "environmental words" to set the
background. Often they are referring to using a time element to place the
poem. An example:
Orange-gold sun rising
Blares through curtained window pane
I hide beneath sheets.
Although you could not tell the season from this poem, you certainly
know that it is morning and probably relate to wishing you could snuggle
back down under the covers for a few more moments before beginning the
day.
Feeling - Contrary to popular belief,
haiku are not staid, unemotional poems. Haiku should stir some emotion
in the reader. After all, that moment stirred enough emotion in you that
you had to write about it. Sadness, happiness, wonder, humor -- all
can be conveyed through haiku. As with choice of imagery, though, emotions
should be conveyed subtly. Instead of saying the frog looked lonely,
give the impression by describing the lonely situation.
In the two poems presented above, I believe the description of my cat
in autumn conveys humor - a soft sarcasm. In the second a longing to put
off the days responsibilities.
Surprise - close
to the idea of feeling is the idea of surprise. Haiku is a moment of discovery.
This does not mean it is designed to shock, but to see the world in a new
way, to share a discovery, or to notice an "everyday" item or moment. One
night, while standing in the shower of my new house, I reached for my shampoo
with my left hand. The light struck my engagement ring and the unexpected
sparkle caught my attention. In a glorious moment of surprise and happiness
I came to the realization that "yes - I really did get married a few months
ago - I am so happy - this isn't a dream!" This haiku is not clear enough
for anyone else to understand my meaning, but to me it summed up that moment
of discovery.
A sudden sparkle
As I reach for my shampoo.
I am where I belong!
Contrast - is a difficult idea to grasp
and is not found in all haiku. It is the idea that haiku must contain some
kind of comparison of two different ideas expressed in the poem. Often
it is so subtle that one has to read the poem several times to recognize.
I must confess, I am not in any way proficient in this area.
