Fag Hags- A Social Analysis / Women who love gay men
There are some women who have a tendency to fall in love with gay
men without realizing their orientation. These women are just
innately attracted to something in the character of gay men. In our
society we socialize men to be tough, "masculine", individuals who
are told to "feel less" then women. We teach young boys not to cry.
Girls are socialized to express emotion. They are also socialized to
be more sensitive, "weak" and "feminine" then boys. Often when girls
reach a point where sexual relationships are desired, they seek out
partners with similar qualities. It is a common idea that women want
sensitive caring men. Yet, because we teach boys to repel these
qualities in themselves, girls often have trouble finding someone
who shares the same qualities.
Gay men, however, tend to be more
"feminine" in the sense that they are more likely to express
emotion, feelings and such. This is due to the fact that gays in
society are mocked and ridiculed by peers. Gay men are called,
"Sissies", "Girly Men", and other terms meant to insult by equating
men to women. Because they are associated with the traits of women,
often it is easier to share those traits and allow themselves the
opportunity to be emotional human beings.
Many women tune into this
quality as a desired characteristic of a mate, and therefore develop
deep feelings for gay men. Often women who develop tendencies for
this type of attraction will continue to do so even after realizing
the tendency. Sometimes they even know that the men they are falling
for are gay, but there is a sense of comfort in it. Though they know
it will not lead to anything, it is easier to take a rejection from
someone if you know the reason is not because of the person that you
are, yet the orientation of the other. It assures the woman that it
is not a problem in her, and also tends to lead to close friendships
which are often almost as important to the woman as a relationship
itself. Next >>
