A Celebration of Our Commitment
Saturday July 18, 1998
Processional: The Bride's a Bonny Thing (trad. Shetland)
Welcome by Dan Reger (a friend of Adrian's)
A marriage is more than a wedding. The act of wedding is but a symbol,
a public announcement of that which is within; a union which the state
makes legal, but which the state can neither create nor quench. At its
heart, a marriage is the promises made and kept by two individuals.
Statement of Intentions
Adrian, you have added wonderful challenges to my life. You
challenge me to be more than I could be by myself. You support me
when I need to take risks to take the next step. You comfort me
when I am afraid. You are stability when I am chaos. I am looking
forward to continuing to share the joys and struggles of living
together, to being open and honest with you, to accepting you, to
seeking always to make ours a growing and fulfilling relationship.
I am looking forward to a life of wonderful challenges with you.
Joni, before meeting you, I felt alone and isolated. In you I have
found a companion, a partner in life. Before meeting you, my life
was unchanging. You help me overcome my inclination to keep doing
the same things. You help bring out my buried desires to try new
experiences. Together we form a team, ready to take on life's
challenges. I look forward to growing together and changing with
you throughout the years.
A Blessing by Carol Mariano (Adrian's mother)
Eternal God, creator and preserver of all life,
Your generous love surrounds us,
and everything we enjoy comes from you.
In your great love you have given us
the gift of marriage.
We ask your blessing on Joni and Adrian.
Give them wisdom and devotion
in the ordering of their common life,
that each my be to the other a strength in need,
a counselor in perplexity, a comfort in sorrow,
and a companion in joy.
Give them grace, when they hurt each other
to recognize and acknowledge their faults,
and to seek each other's forgiveness.
Grant that their will be so knit together
in your will and their spirits in your Spirit,
that they may grow in love and peace
all the days of their lives.
Give them such fulfillment of their mutual
affection that they may reach out
in love and concern for others.
May their hearts be a place of truth and understanding,
their home be a place of welcome and peace.
Surround them with the singing of birds:
the happiness of the bluebird,
the peace of the dove,
the faithfulness of the cardinal,
and the hummingbird's bright color
and quick grace.
Exchange of Vows
Unison: I take you to be my partner in life. I will laugh with you in
the good times, And live with you through the bad. I promise
to stand by your side, and sleep in your arms. I will bring
joy to your heart, and food to your soul, While becoming the
best partner I can be. I vow to comfort you always with my
body, my mind, my laughter, and love. I will share with you
all that I have and all that I am."
Joni: We come together in love for the fulfillment of life.
Adrian: We commit ourselves to a partnership of marriage.
Joni: I promise to accept you as no one other than yourself, loving
what I know of you, trusting what I do not yet know.
Adrian: I promise to laugh with you in joy, grieve with you in sorrow
and grow with you in love.
Joni: I will be your equal, but not your double.
Adrian: I will be your partner, never your shadow.
Joni: Together we will share our discoveries and expand the boundaries
of our lives.
Adrian: Together we will live life to the fullest, for all the days
that we share.
Joni: In the name of all that we have created together and all we are
yet to become, I offer you my hand as your partner.
Adrian: Take my hand and explore with me the limitless wonders of the
world.
Joni: I give you this ring as a symbol of our commitment and as a
reminder that you are not alone in this world.
Adrian: I give you this ring as a symbol of our commitment and as a
reminder that you are not alone in this world.
A Blessing by Diane Seidenstein (Joni's mother)
Dearest Joni and Adrian---
Friday, between your two weddings, you invited family and friends to
join you on an early morning bird walk in Sapsucker Woods. The lovely
local bird refuge. All of us listened and watched with joy and
excitement. A little green heron flew in to join an already standing
great blue. A copper's hawk graced the air. You listened intently to
vireos and sparrows and Sonia delighted in the mushrooms. As I left I
realized how this oasis was a perfect metaphor for the life you two
are creating together.
Today I see the wedding ring as the outer circle of a sanctuary we
create in the process of committing ourselves deeply to one another.
This commitment builds a place of safety and love, a place where each
partner is nourished and nurtured to reach a potential which would be
unattainable alone.
You each come to this relationship with incredible gifts and it is
clear to those of us who know you that the building of your sanctuary
is well underway.
So, the interest of ongoing construction I offer these blessings---
May this refuge be blessed with quiet so you will hear your own soul
voice and that of the other --- so that you will hear and speak those
deep needs and longings to yourself and in one another's presence.
May your sanctuary be blessed with space so you can experience your
heart's joy and pain, excitement and disappointments and acknowledge
those feelings in the other. May there always be room for both your
songs.
And may your sanctuary be blessed with strength and flexibility so
when the mosquitoes and helicopters and jet planes of life intrude,
your refuge will remain intact.
And now to foster continuity between the generations I offer a
blessing that was given at our wedding and many before it ---
Joni and Adrian
May G-d bless and keep you
May G-d shine His countenance upon you
and may She bring you the gift of Shalom, peace.
Explanation of the Breaking of the Glass:
The Breaking of the Glass is a tradition with several meanings. It
teaches us that in times of joy we must also realize life brings
sadness and sorrow. The sound of the breaking glass is said to
frighten away evil spirits who might spoil this joyous occasion
with their mischief. It also warns us that love, like glass, is
fragile and must be protected. The promises made by the bride and
groom, like the broken glass, are irrevocable.
Breaking of the Glass
Recessional: Fyer un Bren (written by Paul Viscuso)
Intimacy (Bride and Groom take ten minutes to themselves)
Appetizers and Lunch Buffet
Cake Cutting
Dancing
Creation of Memory Book
Open activities: Volleyball, horseshoes, bocce ball, frisbee, singing,
croquet or anything that might strike your fancy.
The Apache Wedding Prayer
Now you will feel no rain. for each of you will be a shelter to the other.
Now you will feel no cold, for each of you will be warmth to the other.
Now there is no loneliness for you, for each of you will be companion
to the other.
Now you are two bodies, but there is only one life before you.
May your days be good and long upon the earth!
