1997 Packers in Limerick Form

For the past several seasons I've been sending out weather forecasts for on-line Packer fans. I usually include a remark, sometimes insightful, sometimes witty, sometimes just plain wrong, about what I expect from each game. During 1996 I began including limericks (or reasonable facsimilies), in some of the forecasts, as time and inspiration allowed. The following is a compilation of the limericks from the 1997 season. Note: You have to be a Packer fan to pick up on some of the inside jokes, and because most were written before the game, they don't all accurately reflect what occurred in each game.

Enjoy.

-Keith

Keith Brewster
Norman, OK
kbrews@cox.net
http://members.cox.net/~kbrews/

Bears at Packers

Foghorn notes from his pickup truck,
"I say, whether rain, snow or muck,
The final gun will show,
World Champ'n Pack can crow,
But, son, the Bears still cluck!"


Packers at Eagles

From pulpit he preaches love,
Yet linemen find him no dove;
No wilting Lilly,
The Rev made Philly,
The City of Brotherly Shove.


Dolphins at Packers

A challange for the Packer "D",
To win in week number three,
A quest psychological,
As much ecological,
To keep the Packer zone "dolphin free".


Vikings at Packers

The Pack to hire a team mortician,
As players fall at each position;
Who will survive,
As the Packer drive
Has become a war of attrition?


Packers at Lions

Detroit has a gent named Ross,
now in for the once-aped boss;
A lad named Barry;
Is sure to carry,
letting feet gather no moss.


Packers at Lions, postgame

While Brett shows some proclivity,
Of poor choice in creativity,
I say he's our man,
No mind the dour fan,
Nor the nabobs of negativity.


Buccaneers at Packers, postgame

Wilkins is one amazing fella,
Who's donned the mozzarella;
QB's he hurdles,
Their blood he curdles,
And leaves 'em lookin' quite yella.


Packers at Pats

The Pats have a gun named Drew,
And Coates, an end like our Chew;
Even without Tuna,
He'll trigger soonah,
And not wait for sclera* view.

(*Sclera, the whites of the eyes)


Packers at Pats, postgame

Mike installed some animation
In an offense in hibernation;
The Pats they beguiled,
As the Pack went n' filed,
A report on their bye-week vacation.


Rams at Packers

'Tis Reg and Gabe on the flanks;
They charge the trenches like tanks,
With exuberance irrational,
But not on First National,
As they lead a run on the Banks.


Packers at Colts

There is a team in Indy,
Led by an Unlucky Lindy;
Would it be daft,
To aim for the draft,
And start a backfield of Mork and Mindy?


Cowboys at Packers

The fans will gather en-masse,
For the clash of class against krass;
They'll plead to Fritz,
"Send Butler on blitz,
And head 'em off at the pass."


Packers at Bucs

Unlike the Bucs that we knew,
They've set the standings askew;
On top they have been,
But still they can't win,
Once the temp dips below forty-two.


Packers at Panthers

A blanketing corner is Evans,
And quite a fine back is Levens;
They've risen as stars,
So their agents see cars,
Falling like manna from heaven.


Packers vs. Bills

'Tis the week before Christmas, martinis we're makin';
Not a creature is stirring, preferring ours shaken;
The Division's been won, a bye's been secured,
The road's been tackled, and phobias cured.
Ownership shares are framed and displayed,
Packer vict'ries to be the dividends they pay.

Up from the armchair, against grav'ty he toils,
His frame is massive, his breath charbroiled;
His snacks run the gamut, from turkey to veal,
But under that weight is an ankle to heal.
For pending playoffs we need Gil at his best,
The prescription from Holmgren: salads and rest.

The Bills come to town, their fortunes flaggin',
They've mustered their troops, circled the wagons.
The Pack must stay focused, maintain their peak,
The prize to be guarded is the Lambeau streak.
St. Vince will be watching, if only to say,
"Merry Christmas to all and vict'ry today!"


Packers at 49ers

On to the west, to gold-rush land,
Where wine is white, and tofu bland,
Watch Walrus go toe-to-toe,
With a friend turned foe,
As the Pack takes on Mariucci's band.


Packers vs. Broncos, Super Bowl XXXII

Denver's John is no rookie fool,
A wiley vet in this classic duel.
Will this passer plucky,
Kick like a bronco bucky,
Or be ridden like a rented mule?


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