Iverson Reunion 2002

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Seeing as how there was no reunion letter written for the 2002 because Carla took on an alter ego she refers to as “Old Sally Ann” and refused to do her usual excellent job of producing one.  However; she did produce the following letter which may offer some explanation. 

A letter To Boyd in Heaven, with a copy to M.E.   2002

 Dear Little Brother,

You used to share some of the letters that you wrote to heaven with me, so I know you will understand perfectly my need to write one to you.

Let me tell you about the renovation of the ranch house. 

If you are watching I don’t know if you are crying, or just laughing so hard it looks like you are crying! You should have known what would happen if you left. Why did you leave us here alone at their mercy? You were the best mankind in the family that was ever totally on the sensible side of the women. 

Remember when us girls wanted to get a new stove with an oven that actually worked, since the only one we had was that old worn out castoff, that leaked gas and made a person sick? Did any of the other men want to get it? No way! They said we have this old one that we can still turn on with a monkey wrench and a big pair of pliers, it is plenty good enough, so why would we need a new one?   But you thought like we thought-- and ordered us a new stove, and took it out and installed it for us. 

Back to the house renovation: 

 Move 1. Last spring after the branding was done (and there were no women in sight) everything from the main house was hurled down into the Boyd Room. And I do mean hurled! Then the floor and floor joist were ripped out. Well that is probably good, I thought, they will pour a cement floor and a couple of nice cement steps down into the Boyd Room, and perhaps pour a-- stem wall-- or what ever it is called around the out side of the house. Then they will put all the things back into their places and all will be well. 

HA!! Do you think that is what happened? No way! Not by the longest shot that ever come in Triple Crown winner it wasn’t.   No sireeeeee! 

Move 2. The next time I saw the house it was in a hole! A huge muddy hole! And there were no bottoms to the walls. I ain't kiddin’!    No bottoms! 

 The house was doing some kind of a precarious balancing act (that would have put old, “what’s his face,” Skywalker to shame) on some variety of spindly iron fencing pegs, or something approximating that! (Actually one of them looked more like braided baling wire wrapped around an old branding iron.)  Where the east kitchen window used to be was now a wretched sliding glass door! 

 Ya think I’m funnin' ya don’t ya?   But I ain’t! Not only was it a sliding glass door-- but it was also hanging about three feet from the ground!

 I can just hear you saying, "Oh, come on now, even I couldn’t sell one like that at Dick’s Café on my very best story telling day of the week!” Believe me I understand your suspicion that I’m trying to put one over on you, but it is a true story. Factual all the way!

I was stunned into silence! When I had recovered speech I did finally mumble, “Why in the hell would anyone put a sliding glass door in a kitchen window?”  The thought did briefly cross my mind that maybe they were going to construct a bomb shelter and that would be the secret entrance to fool the terrorists!  However since that was before the      9-11 attack, perhaps I just imagined that that was what crossed my mind; as my mind was quite numb at the time. (Some will say that it always is, and I won’t argue that point)  

However at some period in time, when my brain did finally register that 60 years worth of gravel had been dug away from the house also, amid its unbelievable balancing act; I did venture a feeble query.   “Did any one have a plan? Even the smallest scrap of a plan! On a Dicks Café napkin, an empty matchbook, the unpainted walls of the Boyd room, the outhouse wall--- anyplace at all?         I was met with blank stares. 

Now listen to this. To add insult to injury they took my Mr. And Mrs. Black Sambo utensil holder (that I had made for Mom when I was in third grade) and threw it away! 

 For what reason did they do this you might ask? Well, let me tell you, it was to put a stupid sliding glass door into the east kitchen window! And of course included in this move, that also meant that all the counters, cupboards, and sink just had to go. In the one cupboard were old keepsakes like certain old dishes, and knives, just stuff that would be important to women or dumbbells, certainly not to brain surgeons or rocket scientists. 

They also threw away every bed! Yes that’s right, they did!  That’s right, even Mom and Dad’s bed (the one that you were born in!) Also the sink, the water cooler, the golf clubs, the wash basin (that we had been using to wash our hands, since before you were born.)  All the sheets, blankets, towels, tablecloths etc. that were in the wooden chest. 

 That must be one of the greater mysteries of the world as to why the mouse proof wooden chest was degutted! But then again with no beds why would you need sheets? 

 I was amazed that the table and wood box were spared. I mean after all they are old, real old (probably as old as that one knife that you wanted-- but felt that it should remain at the ranch.) Well I guess it will remain there, but just where I couldn’t say. It might be the same place as HP’s half a missing steer! I think it was only by some miracle that the new stove was saved! Must have been quite a tussle over that decision-maybe they just didn’t have enough manpower to lift it on the trash truck! Your guess is as good as mine is. Probably better! Or perhaps the few remaining items were just an oversight on the part of the trash hauler, and they plan to take care of that later. 

 I still find it really hard to believe that there was an adult there when the casting away took place, especially since none of the things they trashed belonged to them.  Or maybe I was just mistaken when I assumed they belonged to the ranch house and reunion, and needed at least a forum of original cast members before reeking such disposal. 

I did hear on The Echo Piney grapevine, that they claim that the wash basin was stolen!       Riiiiiiiiiiiight!!!!  

  Or perhaps it really was the antique thieves! And that is why they threw away Mom and Dads bed, and all the old keepsakes that used to be in the cupboard (that was on the kitchen wall-- but ain’t no more--) cause it had to give way for an insipid sliding glass door.   That surely must have been the reason pure and simple! They did it to keep them away from the antique thieves! 

Of all the things lost the one that frosts me the most is Mom’s bed.  MOM’S BED! The one saved from the 1940 fire! Max was there and helped Mom save it, so I know-- dingy dang double sure for certain--that he didn’t throw it away! 

In fact both M.E. and H.P. have passed lie detector tests and found innocent of being one of the trash terrorists. 

Well the kitchen walls do reach the ground now, and the sliding glass door has left the east-- used to be-- kitchen wall. How or where it went-- I care not, except maybe it is also the same place as HP half steer! Who knows?  

The cement floor is nice, with a fine smooth finish on it. I did hear, once again on The Echo Piney grapevine that the finisher had to fight off the broom finishers. Good Job! 

 An interesting side note here.  When I was out there reunion time (I was still in shock from cleanup day the week before) there was a that time somewhat of a kitchen counter.  It went right across the window, half of the window above the counter and half  below! Yep, that’s what it did all right.          Yeah I know that you have serious doubts here!                               But don’t!       Then again, after many second thoughts, maybe that was just a hallucination on my part—in a pig’s eye! 

The rest of that part of the house was just mostly empty, as you can probably tell from the list that left the premises. In fact it was so empty that Kevin, Tina and their boys pitched their tent in there and camped out for the night. Might as well, it should serve some reunion purpose. In fact I spent the night in The Boyd Room (somehow the little red iron cot had been spared) I was afraid that if I went to town, by the time I got back out there the next morning, the few things remaining in the house may have mysteriously disappeared down the black hole of Calcutta.

When I woke up at dawn out there, the first thing  I saw were  all the coffee cups, coffee pot, and can of coffee, sitting over in the corner where they had hooked up Dad’s gas hot-plate, and guess what went through my mind. I know that you would never believe that I had such thoughts but I did! I said to myself—self, why don’t you just go over there and gather them all up and go pitch them down the outhouse hole. After all, self said to me, you don’t drink coffee, so why should you care, if anyone else cares if they are gone? Well do you think I did it? I can just hear you saying, nope. And you’re right as usual. 

Yep, I know it’s all hard to believe  but it is a true fact story! Not at all like your fairy stories, that used to start out with, “Now this ain’t no BS!” 

Lastly, I must tell you about the reunion quilt. Remember that you were the one who suggested that we have a reunion quilt. Although you didn’t really like that family tree one, that we did down at Maxie’s too much; However the reunion quilt was your idea! 

 Anyhow, this year, every one was supposed to help do their part of the quilt. Well guess what,  “ One” just didn’t do it. That’s right, they just sent it back-- as blank as a cloudless sky, in the middle of the worst drought, that  has ever been experienced on the Arizona Strip! 

 So we had to take equivocal action; then guess what? The “one” that didn’t help, had the gall to buy tickets on the quilt. (Not from me I might add, I would have told them to find a ticket booth the same place Mom’s bed was or HP half steer, or something equally nasty.) In my defense I must tell you that I had myself under heavy sedation, at the reunion, to help maintain some respectable posture of decorum! 

 In fact I didn’t even know about this (nerve of a government mule action, as the folks used to say) until after the quilt drawing had all ready taken place.  When I looked at the book where it had been recorded who the ticket buyers were and saw that name, well let me tell you my old self-inflicted battle fatigued brain just did back flips! If they would have won that quilt, believe me, I think I would have drawn my dueling pistols and screamed, “Meet me at dawn, on the bank of the pond! ” 

Now I realize that you never did really approve of some of my wild tirades, and fits of temper, vowing revenge, and all that stupid nonsense. But you were always very tolerant of them, and seemed to get me back off the path of self-destruction, without too much damage control having to be done later. 

Do you think you could help just a little again?   A nice dream would be fine.

Maybe you can also explain this mystery to me. If they just wanted a cement slab with walls and a roof, why didn’t they just chalk one off down in the flat, and have at it? Would have been a lot easier all the way around if you ask me, but then I’m just a woman, and hardly ever understand these men things before you explain them! :>} 

Next year will be the 25th   (silver) anniversary of the reunion. I sincerely hope it will be a wonderful one. 

Love you forever, from your earthling sister   PS I have decided to forgive them.       

 

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Last updated: November 29, 2003

Website maintained by Max Iverson with help from Mike Iverson and Tina Hatch.

Major instigator, supporter and contributor: Carla Hawkinson.

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