1 September 1999

Slept well and legs seem a little stronger.  Went back to work.  I’m trying to develop a good outlook, but it’s hard when your body goes to hell in 3 months.

3 September 1999

Felt OK yesterday.  My head is fuzzy.  Have to work at thinking straight.  Tomorrow will be a better day.

4 September 1999

Cut the lawn today.  Stayed out a little too long.  My legs are a little weak.  Avonex injection #5 tonight.  Noticed the numbing in my feet is not as intense and the marble in my left foot is gone.  Is it the Neurontin,  am I getting used to it, or is just another aspect of the MS?  If this is the way it will be most of the time, I can deal with it!

5 September 1999

No bad effects from the Avonex.  My legs are still a little weak.

6 September 1999

Stopped taking the Ditropan XL.  Going is no harder than with it (maybe even a little easier).  Got a week off work to rest.

 8 September 1999

Went to the second Self-Help Group meeting yesterday.  Got a good handout on attitude.  Hopefully I can develop a similar attitude.  Started the Ditropan XL again.  I guess stopping was somewhat of a mistake.  I’ll try to get along without it another time.  Noticed by head seems to be fuzzy a lot lately (makes it hard to think clearly).

10 September 1999

The marble in my left foot is back, but in a different spot.  I think I walked too much.  I trimmed the yard and walked from one end of the mall to the other and back.  Time to call the urologist.  Even with the Ditropan XL it’s getting like it was before.

11 September 1999

The marble in my left foot is still there, but not too bad.  Woke up with a big lump in my forehead (like I got hit with a something – which I didn’t).  Cut the yard today.  It left my legs weak, although it’s a riding mower.  A little rest and the legs are getting better.  Avonex #6 tonight.

12 September 1999

Always seem to need something to help me sleep.  I’m trying not to take them because I feel like I may get addicted.  Before I knew I had MS, my family doctor gave me something (Remeron) that helps you sleep and is not addictive.  Although it did put me to sleep, I didn’t take it because it left my head very foggy.  After the MS attack, they don’t work at all.  No problem again with the Avonex, except for a headache, (almost look forward to the injection)

13 September 1999

Went back to work today after being off for a week.  I felt the numbness returning to my left foot.  Probably from stress, so I tried to get myself to relax.  It seemed to work.  Made an appointment with the urologist for 16 September.

14 September 1999

The marble in my left foot is still there and has been for days.  Feels like it’s getting larger.  It’s only bad when I’m home and walking around without shoes.  Me left leg is getting stiff and sore.  I’m going to try some stretching exercises.

16 September 1999

Saw the urologist.  He gave me a prescription for stronger Ditropan XL. The marble has moved from the ball of my foot to the arch.

18 September 1999

Cleaned the gutters, cut the lawn, trimmed a bush, and set up the sprinklers.  Definitely over did it.  My left leg is exhausted and the right is weak.  Headache all day.  Avonex #7 tonight.

19 September 1999

No problem again with the Avonex.  However, my legs were very weak  I leave for a week business trip to Florida.  Don’t know if the absence of the extreme numbing in my feet is due to the Neurontin or just part of the MS.  Either way only enough left until Friday.  It will be good to finish another medicine, but not if the extreme numbness returns.

24 September 1999

Got back from Florida today.  Did a lot of walking over the week.  I’m trying to think of the walking as exercise that will help keep my legs from getting weaker.   Stairs are the hardest part.  I’ve noticed a few things.  First, my skin is very dry and grainy (kind of like a grain of sand).  Is it a reaction to medication or an MS thing?  Also, when I’m tired or stressed, my voice changes.  Took the last Neurontin on Thursday night.  The numbness is more evident but not as extreme as it was.

25 September 1999

Cut the lawn and trimmed.  Definitely over did it.  Left leg is very weak (again).  As long as I'm not doing any additional damage, I really don't mind (don't like it, but don't mind).  Hopefully, some rest and I’ll be “good as new”.  Avonex # 8 tonight.  Bought a little cart I can sit on to take care of weeding the gardens.  It'll also come in handy for washing and waxing the Vette.

26 September 1999

No bad effects from the Avonex.  It is getting a little more difficult to do the injection (still a mind thing I need to work on).  Cindy volunteered to do the injection, but I wanted to do it.  Noticed I am more hesitant to inject the right leg than the left.  Left calf muscle is still stiff.  I’ll try some stretching.

27 September 1999

Not a good day.  It may be from not taking the Neurontin, fatigue (I’m taking the Lorazepam but am not sleeping well – still on east coast time), or stress (catch-up in the office after being gone for a week).  I feel the numbing in my chest, can’t think clearly, vision is blurry, voice is rough, and my arms feel funny.  Also, the numbing in feet has increased but not nearly as bad as is was.  Something good!  Even though I don’t like to take them, I’ll take a sleeping pill (Ambien) and try and get a good night sleep.

28 September 1999

Still feel bad.  Not as bad as yesterday, but just generally yucky.  My legs hurt (but not too bad) and my voice and vision are still off.  Didn’t sleep too well again (took the sleeping pill [Ambien] two hours after going to bed).  The worst thing today is I’m just down.  Cindy’s down also from seeing what the MS is doing to me.  The good things are I’m still working, walking, and just getting on with life as best I can

29 September 1999

Slept better last night (took the Ambien when I went to bed) and still don’t feel any better.  I’m sore from my feet to my butt.  The grainy skin on my arms, back, head, and face is itchy and driving me crazy.  I’m going to make it a four-day weekend to get some rest.  I hoping the reason I feel so bad is just MS fatigue.

30 September 1999

Felt horrible all-day and left work early (didn't sleep well again).  Seems like everything is sore.  Hell of a way to end the month.  I really don’t want to be this way, but no choice.  Some how have to keep on going.