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Friday, June 25, 2004
4:49 PM

Catch 22
I realized the fundamental problem with my job just minutes ago.

I have a case that I have now been working on for over 3 years. And apparently it is no where near over. That's fine. It's an interesting case with lots of interesting issues. Even fun at times (fun if you are a geeky lawyer who actually likes to do legal research and writing that is).

But I realized that you really can exist in only one of two states.

Option 1:You live, breathe, sleep, eat your cases. They consume you. You get all worked up about every little thing that comes up. The upside to this option is that it's nice being passionate about what you do. It's also much more "fun" to be so excited about work. The downside is that work then consumes you. You wake up in the middle of the night worrying about little details. You can actually feel your blood pressure rise when you get some boneheaded document from the other side. You barrage your spouse and family with inane stories about the other side's latest maneuvering. In short, you have a great quality of life at work, but not so much at home. And your family considers taking out a contract on you.

Option 2:
You do the work but refuse to let it consume you. You care but not so overwhelmingly. After all it isn't your life, money, etc. I'm not saying you don't do good work, but your attitude is just a bit different. The result is that you have inherently less interest in your cases. You do the work but don't get all worked up about it. The drawbacks to this approach are obvious. Time passes much more slowly on work days. The positives are that you actually can have a life outside of work. And your family will consider withdrawing the contract.

I'm caught somewhere between the two and don't know how to move into one camp or another. I get documents and get all worked up. But I can't get motivated to really get into it. I think that after all the crap I've seen in this case, I'm just tired of this guy and his sliminess. I'm disillusioned with how low some people will sink. And the fact that we keep winning is only small consolation. He refuses to quit and I have to keep beating at him and beating at him. (Ok, the winning is better than I give it credit for.)

Sorry for the rant but I am dreading that I will spend the weekend obsessing over the latest documents I received today.

Maybe if I ask nicely my family can transfer to contract over to this guy. (Just kidding obviously!!)

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