American
satire
(excerpt)
Stmt... The polls show Americans still support the president
despite the latest scandal in Washington.
Trans... No one wants to admit that they voted an idiot into
the White House.
Stmt... Donations continue to pour in to the reverend to keep
God from calling him home.
Trans... There is a sucker born every minute.
Stmt... The general denied that defects in the Army's new
tank could be lethal to our soldiers.
Trans... So what? He doesn't have to ride in it.
Stmt... The college president said the fee increase was needed
to maintain academic excellence.
Trans... The new condo was more expensive than he thought.
Stmt... The minister strongly denied that he had a number
or moral transgressions with a prostitute.
Trans... Twice in the choir loft, three times in a motel room,
and once on the dinner table.
Stmt... The press secretary denied that the president fell
asleep during the summit meeting.
Trans... The old buzzard snored like a chainsaw.
Stmt... 18 students died during a spring-break riot in Fort
Lauderdale.
Trans... Who cares?
Stmt... The official said that revenue enhancement is only
attainable through inverse deduction of deficit finance.
Trans... None possible.
...