Silence makes all the difference for first-time retreatant

Sounds of Silence - The sculpture of the Crucified Christ in Loyola Hall speaks volumes to retreatants in the silence of the evening. Several retreatants regularly linger inside near the cross (RIGHT) in silent prayer and reflection after lecture; others notice the crucifix through the arched windows (LEFT) as they pass quietly outside.

When I was approached with the opportunity to join the Men Of Manresa on their summer retreat, I was a little nervous about the decision. The first thoughts that came to mind were, “Am I ready for this?”, “What’s it going to be like?”, and “Can I really go a whole weekend with out talking? I’ve barely ever gone one hour!”

Then it came to me that maybe at this point in my life spiritual guidance is exactly what I need, being that in a month or so I will be attending college and taking on some new responsibilities. However, I had made my decision to go and was semi-confident I could make it.

So the weeks passed until it was time to go to Manresa. The ride up was rather nice as I was informed of the legend they call “Manresa’s Food.” But from experience, the food is truly amazing and should be the least of one’s worries while attending the retreat.

Once we had arrived and were settled, dinner was served and the silence began. I was rather anxious about what the silence would be like, but it was only in my head because I wasn’t focusing on the real reason I was there, “To shut up and let God talk, to do the listening and not the talking,” as a Manresa Jesuit put it.

As the hours passed the fear of silence went away and it began to sink in that this isn’t so bad and I can deal with it, and after all we should be thankful to have the gift of speech in the first place.

I began attending all of the daily instructions and became very moved as to how my view on life and my faith in God were frayed for all these years. Once I entered the library I was drawn to a book entitled “Making Sense Out Of Suffering” by Peter Kreeft. The book explains why we suffer and makes reference to the many ways the Lord suffered for us. I strongly recommend the book to anyone who has doubts about having faith in God and feels he is alone in his personal suffering. I also read a bit of scripture from the Book of Job, the primary example of suffering in the Bible.

As the days of silence and gourmet meals passed, it was finally time to go home. As I was packing my things preparing to leave, I stopped and realized how great an opportunity it was to be able to come here and join the Men of Manresa on their retreat, and to get more in touch with God and His plan for me.

Looking back on a successful retreat I finally learned “to shut up, and let God talk,” and in the words of Robert Frost, “that has made all the difference…”

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